Coughing really loud to cover up the sound of your fart, then shitting your pants.

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Before I meet someone I've never met before, I think of stuff to say or do to prevent it from being awkward, but when I finally meet them I do none of the things I thought about doing.

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Wondering how you look to other people and adjusting your clothes and posture so you don't feel as unatractive as you think you are, but aren't.

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Leave the television on in my room when I go to bed, so I have some light and I can't hear all the creepy sounds that houses make.

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feel like im being watched turn my head sideways and see someone suddenly look away.

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If there is a big spider in the house I will act cool and take it out even though inside I'm screaming

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Spend several minutes to write a comment on a website, only to decide not no submit it after all.

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Delete the whole password when I mess up only the one letter.

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I like to sleep on the floor; my my cushion is too soft.

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hate Justin Bieber

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Assume that on another planet or galaxy there are people just like humans that look exactly like me. Like an alternate universe.

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When I tell human garbage that I am the Fallen Angel, they laugh at me, then I make them spontaneously combust. Moral: What moral whore?

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When at a red you watch the light real close and as soon as it turns green you try to beat the other cars to the other side of intersection

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Fall down the stairs, bounce on your ass to the bottom, feel scared, then want to DO IT AGAIN! Get pwned at a game, rage, look at your cat sitting beside you, looking back, and say "What?"

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Daydream about doing unspeakable things(killing, raping, beating, cutting, shooting, ect.) to the person you hate

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dont wash hands for the recommended 30 seconds

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When I'm reading a book and I come to a word that is long or difficult to pronounce every time I come to that word again I pronounce it 'manamanam'.

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Every time I miss a gree light by just a couple seconds, I think to myself, "Maybe if I had made that light an out of control semi would be slamming into my car right at this moment." Thank you red light.

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Boring car ride? Read every food & drinks rapper you can find .

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When im alone i rub myself in vasaline and pretend that im a slug on the kitchen floor.

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Walk out of movie thinking that I would be like them some day.

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Picking your dogs booger for him/her

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Pee while setting down even if your a dude.

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When climbing onto an escalator, I cannot just step on it and go, I have to mentally prepare myself and time my steps to get on, especially if it's going down, cause I'm terrified I will fall off... I usually end up irritating the people behind me trying to get on, as it takes me almost 10 to 15 seconds to find the right step.. And also, I cannot touch the escalator's sides.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.