Go through funny pictures and memes on Facebook, and then accidently miss one and ten when you click to go back you have to go through like 5 more to get back to the one you want.

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R A P E Children

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Stay up late on the weekdays and go to bed early on the weekends ..... What is wrong with me?

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i randomly grab my boobs when i'm home alone. like, all the time.

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instinctively thumb down long posts without reading them.

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Masturbate while waiting for a game to load.

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Pick giant boogers and eat them.

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When I'm walking on a sidewalk, I try to step on each tile an even amount of times.

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When I was younger I used to think that Red bull was a drink that really did give you wings like they show in the commercials

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Find something you dislike about your face/body and instantly compare it with every person you meet from then on

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Take nibbles whenever you get to the last piece of your burger to make it last longer.

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Think about all of the germs that are on restroom doors and water taps.

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when someone says something like 'it's too late' i always start singing 'to apologizeeeeee' even though i think people are annoyed of me always singing along to their sentences and changing the meaning, but i just cannot stop it

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Really really happy that resisted getting a facebook or twitter account

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When in a outhouse I get scared that I can't unlock the door. This one time in the winter the lock froze and I was almost stuck

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Too lazy to exercise. Think to self "I'm gonna work out tomorrow." - instantly feel better about self. Still didn't exercise.

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When I look at a digital clock, i try to rearrange the number to make them a math equation

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interview yourself over some amazing accomplishment you achieved like becoming the youngest emmy winner and pretending you're really humble.

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Whenever there is a volume button on something i have to make sure its on a number 5 ie: 0,5,10,15

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I always twist my washcloth into a cone shape, so when I take my next shower it is dry and hardened. Then I pretend stab it into my stomach and say "MY LIFE FOR AIUR!" before getting it wet again.

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When in a public bathroom, flush the toilet right before your shit falls into the water, so no one will hear.

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Act like your on a cooking tv show when your cooking

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Having small fingers and, regardless, still unable to click on the right thing when on the internet with a touch screen phone.

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I used to pretent my legs didn't work and pulled myself up the stairs with just my hands.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.