I aphabeticalize my shoes

thumb_up thumb_down -109

Whenever I Iook into the mirror, I think there's a second evil dimension.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

I always have trouble leaving a airplanes lavatory I never get the door open

thumb_up thumb_down -112

I only used to eat McCoys Salt & Vinegar crisps when it was raining, because I thought they tasted better when it rains. Anyone else?

thumb_up thumb_down -60

I use the internet to validate that weirdness is not actually weird at all.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

When I'm riding passenger in a car, things I'm driving past will be a part of my imaginary drum kit. When a car passes in the opposite direction, I'll tap my right foot as the bass drum, a drain hole along the gutter is my left hand snare, and the street signs and lights are the hi-hats in my right hand.

thumb_up thumb_down -79

I talk through my teeth when i am talking to my pets.

thumb_up thumb_down -56

Think about past screw ups, then cross my eyes thinking to myself "I'm such a F---ing retard."

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Sometimes I imagine that I am in a coma and all of the things of this world are not real. Then when I wake up from the coma I will be the best inventor of all time.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Tell myself that I'm only going for a 20 minute nap and end up sleeping for 1/+ hour(s)...

thumb_up thumb_down -34

I use my magic powers to give shaddy politicians their comeuppance (I don't have any magic powers lol)

thumb_up thumb_down -88

sometimes I can be really tired but when I go to bed I lie there for hours awake

thumb_up thumb_down -24

fart and talk thinking it will cover the smell

thumb_up thumb_down -44

You do a retarded dance when a song you don't like comes on

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Sit on the loo and think about life because I can't be bothered to get up

thumb_up thumb_down -47

Worry that I'm will go schizophrenic.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

When it's as quiet as possible in the classroom in the middle of the period and everyone is silently doing their work.... I suddenly think of something REALLY funny and spend the next half hour awkwardly grinning trying my hardest not to burst out uncontrollably.

thumb_up thumb_down

ask my dog questions then realize, she can't talk...

thumb_up thumb_down +52

look around my house for something to do for what feels like an hour then look back at a clock to realize thats its only been 4 minutes

thumb_up thumb_down -41

Getting over excited when you hear a song you like on the radio, even though you have it on your Ipod and can listen to it whenever you want.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

You take showers on school morning because you like to stand there under the hot water just thinking about life while your warm

thumb_up thumb_down -40

Only read the shortest sentences on "Things You Think Only You Do". More than 2 sentences I skip.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Force a piss out really hard because you're in a rush.

thumb_up thumb_down -98

When I Was Little I Always Slept On My Stomach Even If I Wasn't Comfortable Because I Thought It Would Be Harder For Aliens To Abduct Me.

thumb_up thumb_down -62

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.