Go through funny pictures and memes on Facebook, and then accidently miss one and ten when you click to go back you have to go through like 5 more to get back to the one you want.

R A P E Children

Stay up late on the weekdays and go to bed early on the weekends ..... What is wrong with me?

i randomly grab my boobs when i'm home alone. like, all the time.

instinctively thumb down long posts without reading them.

Masturbate while waiting for a game to load.

Pick giant boogers and eat them.

When I'm walking on a sidewalk, I try to step on each tile an even amount of times.

When I was younger I used to think that Red bull was a drink that really did give you wings like they show in the commercials

Find something you dislike about your face/body and instantly compare it with every person you meet from then on

Take nibbles whenever you get to the last piece of your burger to make it last longer.

Think about all of the germs that are on restroom doors and water taps.

when someone says something like 'it's too late' i always start singing 'to apologizeeeeee' even though i think people are annoyed of me always singing along to their sentences and changing the meaning, but i just cannot stop it

Really really happy that resisted getting a facebook or twitter account

When in a outhouse I get scared that I can't unlock the door. This one time in the winter the lock froze and I was almost stuck

Too lazy to exercise. Think to self "I'm gonna work out tomorrow." - instantly feel better about self. Still didn't exercise.

When I look at a digital clock, i try to rearrange the number to make them a math equation

interview yourself over some amazing accomplishment you achieved like becoming the youngest emmy winner and pretending you're really humble.

Whenever there is a volume button on something i have to make sure its on a number 5 ie: 0,5,10,15

I always twist my washcloth into a cone shape, so when I take my next shower it is dry and hardened. Then I pretend stab it into my stomach and say "MY LIFE FOR AIUR!" before getting it wet again.

When in a public bathroom, flush the toilet right before your shit falls into the water, so no one will hear.

Act like your on a cooking tv show when your cooking

Having small fingers and, regardless, still unable to click on the right thing when on the internet with a touch screen phone.

I used to pretent my legs didn't work and pulled myself up the stairs with just my hands.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.