Cringe when remembering something weird about you that happened years ago

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When someone sits with crossed legs, I notice their lifted foot throb slightly with their pulse. It is really distracting sometimes.

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Leftovers are better than the actual meal ;)

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Spending the night at someone's house and waking up and thinking your at your house then realizing your not

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I sleep in my underpants every single night

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Think about my life as a book when I'm in public, for example "I then walked over to my friend to say hello to him."

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When you Saigon the couch and say "I am hungry" but then don't do anything because you are too lazy.

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dont wash hands for the recommended 30 seconds

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Stare blankly at your desktop when someone walks in the room so they won't know that you were watching porn lol

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Wonder why every single kid is looking at you in a restaurant.

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i cant fall asleep unless i suck my thumb...

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Sometimes I feel that my reflection in the mirror will stop doing what I'm doing and either jump out and grab me, start telling me about her reflected life, or give me a mission to free her from her mirror life.

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Realizing that I can just yell out the word "Fuck!" and no one can stop me.

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Massive hang-over. Say out loud and promise I will never drink like that again. Next time drink atleast as much as the last time.

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Try to balance on and off on the light switch.

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start telling someone a story and then realize that i would only be funny if they actually saw it.

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Watching movies about couples with age gaps and woundering how it would feel like to be with somebody much older (or younger) than you. Would they use viagra or would you not even try to have sex with someone so old and delicate?

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Never step on manholes, because I'm afraid to fall in.

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Turn the fan and/or sink on in the bathroom to drown out the noise from masturbating.

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Sometimes when I'm all alone, I like to rub vasceline on myself and pretend I'm a slug.

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.don't like something because being scared that it appears on my wall.

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pick leaves of bushes while im walking and rip them up into small pieces

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I often force my mind to think that i'm slowing down time at will just to feel awesome (like when walking down the street i try to make the all cars slow down).

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Someone waves at me and I wave back...and then I realize they were waving at someone behind me.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.