When telemarketers call I speak Afrikaans to them until they hang up

thumb_up thumb_down -59

Leave those last one or two sheets of toilet paper after taking a crap just so you don't have to replace it.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

When at a restaurant you practice your order inside your head, then when you actually have to order you mess it up.

thumb_up thumb_down -50

That feeling you get where you slip on something but you save yourself just in time and your just like "holy crap, i almost cracked my head and died," then two minutes later your legs are still shaking

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Your mom

thumb_up thumb_down -48

Worry that I'm will go schizophrenic.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Going to the bathroom in public just to scratch my butt

thumb_up thumb_down -58

Change the channel when a Progressive commercial comes on because I can't STAND that stupid Flo girl.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

I make weird crazy faces at myself in the mirror whenever I leave the bathroom.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Sometimes I think my shit smells delicious... and I cant believe I am actually not only typing it here, but "finally" admitting it to myself.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

I like to turn the lights off in the bathroom, actually block every little bit of light I possibly can, then take a nice warm shower, curl up on the floor, block my ears and enjoy the warm water and sensory deprivation.

thumb_up thumb_down -50

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

thumb_up thumb_down -102

sneeze without closing my eyes

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Hearing someone singing a song and stopping midway, so you need to finish it.

thumb_up thumb_down -92

When an ice cube fall on the floor I kick it under the fridge.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Hate people who don't dress like you because they're not fashionable. Hate people who do dress like you because they threaten your individuality.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Save more than once on your favourite game.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Looking outside the window and imagining a huge explosion destroy everything and then u surviving and trying to find a way to survive

thumb_up thumb_down -52

I wish I can go somewhere where there is no influences trying to get me to buy a product or be a certain way

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Close the Facebook page, after not having a single message in hours, and re open it in a minute, expecting numerous new messages......

thumb_up thumb_down -43

Pretending to use the force while a door closes behind you, then thinking your brilliant :) -Tim.

thumb_up thumb_down -86

disgusted by people that are obsessed with poo and pee

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Believing in the kindness of strangers

thumb_up thumb_down -63

When im in a room alone on the computer i like to put on songs and lip sync to them in the mirror with really emotional expressions..

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.