I'm ridiculously turned on by the scent nail polish.

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Whenever on a car ride, pretend you are in a military convoy and shoot at pursuing helicopters and soldiers.

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When your to lazy try to use the force to pick things up

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When out I like to "people watch."

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taking a shit while brushing my teeth.

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If i read or see something good (on tv )the next time i daydream i am always some how involved in it

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moving your hand with objects that are already moving and pretending you have the force.

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I use my phone's auto-correct to make sure the words I'm writing are correct.

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When I tell human garbage that I am the Fallen Angel, they laugh at me, then I make them spontaneously combust. Moral: What moral whore?

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Secretly think that Flo from the Progressive commercials is bangable.

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on hot summer days when I exit the shower I only dry off my legs to the point where they aren't dripping but my leg hair is still wet.

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I prefer to masturbate by putting a fleshlight under my stuffed-toy smurfette's dress and pretend to smurf her.

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getting excited when you find a recycled tissue in your robe/sweatshirt so you don't know have to get up to get one yourself?

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Put the towel near the shower so that you can stand on it and not get the floor wet

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Hearing a noise and turning around to see if theres a monster in the room, and when you see nothing you think "hmm, he hides everytime I turn my head around." and then for the next minute you try to suddenly look back to see if you can catch it off guard.

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Inspect the shower, bath or toilet, then washing it until you believe it is suitable to use.

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Think about all of the germs that are on restroom doors and water taps.

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rub your face on your legs after shaving to feel how smooth they are.

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wonder y nobody facebook likes or comments on these

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See someone walking or in their car driving then imaging what they're doing next or imagine the rest of their life.

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Think something you shouldn't about someone, stop thinking about it in case they read your mind, and then, as an added precaution, think "I know you listening".

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Thinking about how fast you blink and how many times you have blinked. You then start blinking too much because you are thinling about yourself blinking, and you try to stop, but you can't stop thinking about it.

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When i go to the bathroom i have to lift my shirt up the whole way.

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You tell your friends that you hate the Rick roll'd song even though you secretly like it.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.