after you've been in a fight i usually think up some epic move i could've done instead.

Text random people saying I'm pregnant

When someone starts waving and saying hi then I start waving and saying hi even though I have no idea who it is only to realize they are actually waving at someone behind me.

pretend you have a fishing pole and are reeling in cars to pass them when your in the passengers seat going down the freeway.

Back away as much as I can from airplane toilets before flushing them because the noise scares me

I rate certain songs on my iPod higher than others because if someone else is checking out my playlists, I don't want them knowing how much I really love that super cheesy song from the early 90's (even though every time it comes on, I hit repeat at least 3 times and sing aloud as loudly as I think I can get away with. I really, really love that song!).

My bedroom is at the end of the house, so when I turn the light out and sprint to the lounge room, thinking Jeff the Killer could get me...

I don't like just killing bugs in my home so what I do is I would catch them in a tissue and flush them down my toilet

When i'm in the front passenger seat, I still move my foot like im the one driving...

Stepping on a concrete sidewalk square the exact amount of times as the others.

There's this reassuring voice in my head. She's almost like a mother, telling me that it'll be alright and that I have things to do.

When you are taking a test or anywhere , you remember something funny and you laugh randomly looking like a dumbass then pretend to cough.

Surfing nsfw subreddit at work

I think about other women when having sex

Tally mark everytime I take a shit.

Tough but loving hands!! Mmm them calluses tho!! ^_^

Think about having sex with the dog. You wouldn't, but what if you did?

check shower for murder then pee

Wanting to be the Walmart baby model as a kid ^_^

When you know your alone, you still have to check the whole house.

Hearing someone say something but saying "what" because you need more time to think of an answer

Archer's Pam poovey, Lana Kane and Malory makes me horny

Fall down the stairs, bounce on your ass to the bottom, feel scared, then want to DO IT AGAIN! Get pwned at a game, rage, look at your cat sitting beside you, looking back, and say "What?"

I choose not to post a comment on some subjects because I know there will be a hundred others that will be the same.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.