When I'm sitting on the toilet, I try to make piss and crap come out at the same time.

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Sometimes hold a piece of chocolate between your fingers until it melts then lick the yummy gooeyness off your fingers

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When in class , I move alot in my chair when my butt itches .

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sometimes when I'm eating, I eat with the opposite side of my mouth. just to be fair to it.

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Skip the first 3 minutes of "Free Bird" because it's too slow.

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Hit the off button on the microwave three times to simulate the sound it makes when time is up.

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Run back into your room when your microwaving something

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Take baths

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Pretend my life is a videogame.

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No ones home. Go to youtube and do karaoke. Can the neighbors here me? Guess im not talking to them ever again...

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I like wet humping better than f*cking. but sometimes it slips in anyway, and it's that's pretty enjoyable too. and mt girlfriend is cool with. ... so it's actualy pretty whatevs either way. but wet humping is my jam.

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I say a word and it feels like it didnt roll off of my tongue right, so I keep mouthing the word and saying it quietly to myself or in my head. Then end up saying it loudly in affirmation, possibly more than once.

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I always get paranoid when I go to take a shit because I leave the computer on and somebody comes in the room where the computer is.

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I have to look at myself in multiple mirrors before I leave my apartment. Sometimes if I'm alone, I'll walk back and forth between 2 or 3 mirrors about 25 times before I'm content to leave.

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When you're walking and think of something funny and start laughing, but you don't want people to think you're weird, so you pull out your phone and pretend you're texting.

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I Never read the Terms of Service but click the box anyway .

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Take off the ends of the banana (

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Sometimes when someone says something to me, I will hear them perfectly clear, but I will instinctively say "what?"

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Walking into a room to do something, and then forgetting what you were gonna do.

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When you're walking along at night and you see the moon, then you move around quickly,still looking at it as if you're controlling it.

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You look over the edge of a tall building/structure, and have that sudden urge to jump off.

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When I am in a bind and I know I need help I just say " I gott this" and things work out

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While trying to sleep I obsess over the little red LED on the TV set which I can't even see unless I lift my head from the pillow.

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Say something smart in class, then worry your friends will rip ony uo for it half way through saying it, so end it by saying "or something like that."

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.