I can read people's life's and figure out the truth about them with out them telling me how their life is

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Sometimes while texting or messaging, I enact the physical gestures that accompany what I'm saying as if it were an in-person conversation, even though no one can see me.

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I brace myself and close my eyes when I send an email to my teachers or parents.

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sit closer to the water so my poop isn't so loud..

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If two cars towing boats were to crash into each other, Would that make it a boating accident?

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When you're alone in a room and you have to turn on the TV so it's not as silent...

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Try to acomplish getting the rest of your meal reaady before the microwave timer goes off.

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I like to watch online videos of people and pause the video mid sentence to see the faces they make frozen mid speech

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When I see someone who is clearly wealthy, I think to myself "I could do it better than you..."

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Always check the other side of the shower curtain when showering out of fear that someone is on the other side

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chewing icecream before you swallow it

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I don't thumb down any submissions because then I am just as bad as the people who thumb down mine

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Try to keep a balloon in the air with out touching the ground, using anything but my hands -Noel

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I wish I can go somewhere where there is no influences trying to get me to buy a product or be a certain way

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I have an imaginary therapist. I talk to him in my head and he actually gives me really good answers.

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My butthole itches, so I fart to scratch it.

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Sometimes I won't do something just to see how long it takes before someone else does it (dishes, throw something away, fill the ice cube tray, etc.).

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Wish that Mexicans would go to their OWN country and stop living tax free in OURS.

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When reading something on the internet highlighting the words, they don't even have to be what you'r reading just highlighting large sections of the article at random.

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i have my own way of eating every chocolate bar i eat, layer by layer

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Writing/ Typing "wemon" to represent more than 1 women, but then realizing that it's not actually a word...

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I always feel like i have to eat something while watching a movie that I've seen so many times.

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I am 23 and I still wish the stalk will take back my younger brother

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When the font allows it, try to hide the cursor in capital I's.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.