- Things You Think Only You Do

Say "what?" when you know what they said, then answer before they can respond. I do it because it takes me a second to figure out what they said and so my immediate response it "what?".

Thinking you could be in a "Truman Show" style scenario and scanning areas of your house and possessions for tiny little cameras and microphones.

Try to keep a balloon in the air with out touching the ground, using anything but my hands -Noel

Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie)

I used to drive home from my girlfriend's house late at night and stop on a stretch of road to take a leak. I'd walk backwards while peeing, creating a crooked line of pee in the road. I'd add to it night after night, then I'd drive by in the day to see my long pee stain in the road only I knew about. Anyone who passed by could see it, but only I knew what it was. It would last until the next rain and I'd have to start over.

I sit sideways on the toilet because my bony butt fits better that way.

Think about the same confusing random dilemas that dont involve me every week and alwaus come to the same conclusion

When you are taking a test or anywhere , you remember something funny and you laugh randomly looking like a dumbass then pretend to cough.

When I play Sims, I feel like God and wonder if we, in fact, are just the players in God's Sims game. Hmmmm...

When the font allows it, try to hide the cursor in capital I's.

If I'm trying to read a clock or bulletin from far away, I instinctively stand and point at it.

flushing the toilet eventho not yet finish pee-ing. So that the water sucks it right after the last drop of your pee. Saves 2-3seconds of your life.

Only read the shortest sentences on "Things You Think Only You Do". More than 2 sentences I skip.

Remove all the stupid gobbldegook words that the captchas from this site add to my predictive text.

When i was little i used to see people's cars shaking and wondered why they were listening to a song that just goes "BOOM BOOM BOOM"

When a person tells you: Oh you like Lana Del Rey? Me:No,I like the wall

Spend countless hours looking at cars online I know I'll never be able to afford

When I walk past a homeless person asking for change, I avoid looking them in the eye and walk faster.

pull out a flies wings and let it go

If I have to put the garbage out at night I sprint back into the house so the monsters don't get me

Sometimes cringe at the sound when other people scratch themselves

I say a word and it feels like it didnt roll off of my tongue right, so I keep mouthing the word and saying it quietly to myself or in my head. Then end up saying it loudly in affirmation, possibly more than once.

Sitting on the toilet and feel devastated I forgot my smartphone and then spending the rest of my time on the toilet thinking about how boring it is without my smartphone.

when riding home on my bike with music on pretenend im in a race with no1 and commentate on iend get really exccited on the last straight especielly when a rocky soundtrack song comes on

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.