- Things You Think Only You Do

When i close the refrigiator door, i re-open it and give it a good shove to make sure it tight.

Scratch my asshole and always judge it to be okay to continue my day, no matter how bad the smell.

I make weird crazy faces at myself in the mirror whenever I leave the bathroom.

Skip the first 3 minutes of "Free Bird" because it's too slow.

If I'm alone, I'll imagine myself as somebody else an start acting as if I'm in a different life, complete with different people and places because in my imagination, I get to control what is going to happen next. Because, my imagination is way better than my reality.

I have won so many competitions online for things like being the 99, 999th visitor on the site

Sometimes if I am by myself at the house or in the car I will act completely insane and absurd. This usually involves me screaming incoherent babble, whole body twitching, making absurd faces and doing this thing where I bite my tongue and shake my head violently. If any normal person saw me they would either think I am having a seizure or currently possessed by Satan.

When I walk past a homeless person asking for change, I avoid looking them in the eye and walk faster.

See how fast and accurate i can use the fast forward on my dvr and applaud myself when i go full speed and stop 2 seconds before the show is back on.

I like to record the audio from TV shows and movies onto cassette tapes from my stereo, and listen to them on my Walkman while I'm working in the kitchen or around the house.

Whenever I'm in the shower, I never close my eyes because I think someones gonna kill me

Sitting on the toilet and feel devastated I forgot my smartphone and then spending the rest of my time on the toilet thinking about how boring it is without my smartphone.

When serving grilled steak, I always make sure I get the best one.

Sick the top of you fingers in your pants when you are doing something that requires one hand, like watching t.v

taking a shit while brushing my teeth.

after you've been in a fight i usually think up some epic move i could've done instead.

I have the background on my computer a picture of some cartoon characters,and when I'm alone I talk to the screen like those characters are actually in the room. -Briarwoodninja

I rate certain songs on my iPod higher than others because if someone else is checking out my playlists, I don't want them knowing how much I really love that super cheesy song from the early 90's (even though every time it comes on, I hit repeat at least 3 times and sing aloud as loudly as I think I can get away with. I really, really love that song!).

When you are speaking to someone with a distinct accent and suddenly take on the accent as your own when responding. - Missy Chemick

Every time I miss a gree light by just a couple seconds, I think to myself, "Maybe if I had made that light an out of control semi would be slamming into my car right at this moment." Thank you red light.

My bedroom is at the end of the house, so when I turn the light out and sprint to the lounge room, thinking Jeff the Killer could get me...

I don't like just killing bugs in my home so what I do is I would catch them in a tissue and flush them down my toilet

Stepping on a concrete sidewalk square the exact amount of times as the others.

I wonder what would happen if time froze and only I could move. I think about all the things I could do.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.