I flick my boogers on the carpet knowing that I can just vacuum them up later.

I chew around the center of carrots.

I practice my signature on a piece of paper over and over again. Even though my signature has never changed.

When it is raining and a sad song comes on the radio, I look out the window and pretend I am in a movie. -Cocobear

Sometimes when my teacher calls on me in class I imagine myself saying F**** you and then having the whole class look at me in disbelief

I am Moral Man your friendly r*pist neighboorhood, what only I can do? I can steal, cheat, kill r*pe boys and girls, cats, not mouse heck I am no pervert either see? All this and I can still be... ...A SMOOTH CRIMINAL! AH! YAHOOW!

I wonder why the word ISLAND has an "S" in it?

I sometimes put posts not just of things I do but also of things I know other people do

I always write b as d or d as b since I've learned the alphabet, and i hate my keyboarb cuz its on lower case every time.

think that the NSA is always watching what you do online at any time you are even connected.

When I drive I sing really loud and then when a car come up next to me I pretend I wasn't singing

when i pass a grave yard, i am compelled to hold my breath

When I am drinking coffee and I am nearly finished I swish the coffee to get the last of the sugar

Sometimes, when I'm alone and it's dark outside, I like to cover my body in petroleum jelly and pretend to be a slug.

I always have to know exactly what time it is before I go to sleep, just so I can figure out exactly how many hours of sleep I will get.

The girl I like has just managed to transfer her consciousness into my mind, now being to hear my every thought and see everything I do. Just. Act. Cool.

I save my files as "askjaskjaks" because I'm too lazy to give them a proper name.

While watching a movie, I hold my breath whenever there is a scene with the main character underwater just to see how long i would last in that situation.

When listening to headphones, I automatically start lip syncing the lyrics... But stop doing it when people look at me funny..

When I'm walking along and just trip over my own foot I look back and pretend to look at whatever it was I tripped over.

I sometimes start moving my hands around "making them fight" pretending they are tiny fighters.

While driving out in the country area, I am secretly looking for Squatch

Flexing your abs when you put on deodorant so you dont look fat

If I'm trying to read a clock or bulletin from far away, I instinctively stand and point at it.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.