When I fap at friends house, I use mobile data instead of his wifi incase history can be seen

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Think your teacher is super hot and have a hard time concentrating in class . . . for the whole year.

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Hatch an escape plan as soon as my date starts to complain about anything.

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when you're microwaving something and you have to pee, you run to the bathroom. then you run back to see if there is still time left before the "bomb" goes off.

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Being afraid to close your eyes when you're washing your hair in the shower because you think a murderer will be right there when you open your eyes again. That or Scared to shower when your home alone at night.

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At school I go along with the norm even though inside I HATE it!!!!

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i always think people can hear my thoughts.

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When I am talking about someone, I check my phone to make sure it hasn't dialed them and to make sure they aren't listening.

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When you say bye to someone and keep walking in the same direction, and then its really awkward...

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This is kind of embarrassing... after I watched "Truman Show" I went home and talked to my mirror like Jim Carrey does in the film.

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Feel like puhing the crap out of people who talk loud in public places.

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Poop naked.

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I make a mental note NOT to buy the product or service if I feel they are trying to brainwash me with their ads.

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I like to watch online videos of people and pause the video mid sentence to see the faces they make frozen mid speech

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When I was younger I used to challenge myself with touching the roof I would first jump and see if I could touch it then I would try and see how long I can touch it and now every once in a while I just touch it and think of how far I have come.

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When home alone, I put cans in front of the door so if someone breaks in, I wake up.

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Hum up and down in pitch because it makes LED displays dance around.

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Pour the cheap shampoo I can only afford these days into the empty expensive bottle to trick myself I'm still using the good stuff.

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Tally mark everytime I take a shit.

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When a teacher at school leaves a line of pen on the big whiteboard, my attention can NOT be drawn from it.

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I choose not to post a comment on some subjects because I know there will be a hundred others that will be the same.

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I am 23 and I still wish the stalk will take back my younger brother

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flushing the toilet eventho not yet finish pee-ing. So that the water sucks it right after the last drop of your pee. Saves 2-3seconds of your life.

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If I see the same model of vehicle as mine in a parking lot, I get overly excited if I manage to get a parking spot next to it. Extra points for same color or type (i.e. quad cab vs regular cab).

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.