when you have just ended a argument with someone and you think what else you could of said that would have been better to say

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Sometimes, when I'm alone and it's dark outside, I like to cover my body in petroleum jelly and pretend to be a slug.

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I have a feeling that life is a Video Game for another Universe. When the player looks at their computer screen, they see what I see. They control everything I do. Like The Sims games. Everyone else is either other players in a multiplayer server, or they are are all fake, computer players.

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The girl I like has just managed to transfer her consciousness into my mind, now being to hear my every thought and see everything I do. Just. Act. Cool.

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When walking around a slightly empty store, I walk around and pretend I'm a spy, trying not to be seen.

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sometimes i poop in my pants and like the smell of my poop. Smells like whatever i just ate.

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Look at my poop before flushing

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when going through this website only read post that have 2 or more thumbs up

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I sometimes start moving my hands around "making them fight" pretending they are tiny fighters.

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Blow on your ice cream for no apparent reason before you eat it.

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If I have a top comment and I see someone else does, I upvote both of ours; friendly competition.

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twirl your penis in a cirlce and make the woo woo sound

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Fall down the stairs, bounce on your ass to the bottom, feel scared, then want to DO IT AGAIN! Get pwned at a game, rage, look at your cat sitting beside you, looking back, and say "What?"

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I choose not to post a comment on some subjects because I know there will be a hundred others that will be the same.

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Pee while setting down even if your a dude.

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Eat my shed skin from a sunburn

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I hump my bed at night and pretend it's a hot model

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It's hot but I still have on covers

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sing like a pro in da shower

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Miss the bus, keep running pretending I was going somewhere else.

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Vote for the other guy

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When out I like to "people watch."

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Stepping on a LEGO block and instantly screaming and leap onto the bed.

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Sitting on the toilet and feel devastated I forgot my smartphone and then spending the rest of my time on the toilet thinking about how boring it is without my smartphone.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.