Drool a lil bit and continue eating...

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Fantasize a situation that turns you into a person with superpowers or something.

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When I play Sims, I feel like God and wonder if we, in fact, are just the players in God's Sims game. Hmmmm...

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Every time i find an insect in my basement i grab it put it in the toilet and pee on it victoriously while its being flushed down. But Im a nice guy, and i worry about this evil hatred i have towards insects.

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Coughing really loud to cover up the sound of your fart, then shitting your pants.

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when i talk to someone, and the one where i am talking with is saying a sentence very fast, am going to repeat the whole sentence in my head and then it sounds really weird.

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No ones home. Go to youtube and do karaoke. Can the neighbors here me? Guess im not talking to them ever again...

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I enjoy my company, I love myself, which is contagious, people around me enjoy my company, and love themselves. Moral: Thumb me down and prove you are a sad fuck TODAY!

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Buy tons of movies and only watch them once. Rarely buy books and reread them a million times.

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Sometimes when walking, accidently fart and then try to squeak my to sound like my shoes squeaked instead of me farting.

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Take baths

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I feel that there is something sinister going on in government

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when you are pooping you fart and it scares you a little bit.

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Play my music so low in public that I can hardly hear it in my headphones for fear of others being able to hear what I'm listening to.

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you know that when things have only one like on this site, the people who wrote it liked it

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Watched the woman in black then go to bed then suddenly a woman in black comes in my room oh wait it is just my mum saying good night

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see if I can hold my breath when walking down a long hallway

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Become self-conscious and wonder if you were making faces while day dreaming during the middle of class.

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Sometimes when my teacher calls on me in class I imagine myself saying F**** you and then having the whole class look at me in disbelief

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You look over the edge of a tall building/structure, and have that sudden urge to jump off.

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When someone is talking to me and I'm not really listening, when it gets quiet I say 'that's crazy' so they think I'm listening.

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Stick my hand all the way to the bottom of a tub of grease.

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cussing someone out on a video game only to realize that your mic is off

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Fart after someone else farts sop that no one will know you did too.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.