Trying not to fart when laughing is challenging.

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Judge a stranger in your mind (God, they're ugly/fat etc.) then wonder if they heard you thinking it.

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I HATE minecraft gift codes and the morons who post about them. I wish those morons would get off my planet.

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In public,try to make eye contact with most people.

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Sometimes when I'm all alone, I like to rub vasceline on myself and pretend I'm a slug.

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When I'm watching something or playing something and the character goes underwater, I hold my breath until the character reaches the surface. This is weird as hell, does anyone else do this?

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Sometimes I feel that my reflection in the mirror will stop doing what I'm doing and either jump out and grab me, start telling me about her reflected life, or give me a mission to free her from her mirror life.

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When a male dies and screams in pain in a movie, I feel normal about it. When a female does, I feel bad and want to help.

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Talk to my cat.

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I sometimes watch entire movies with the sound off and a good album playing.

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Back away as much as I can from airplane toilets before flushing them because the noise scares me

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feed a gecko worms every day, not the good worms though...

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Try to do things while waiting for the microwave.

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When you sit down to use the toilet, start, and then realize that the window is open and people can hear you.You then either search for something to mask the sound or proceed to relieve yourself by making as little noise as possible (ultimately failing)

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check for spiders under the toilet seat before taking a dump

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I save my files as "askjaskjaks" because I'm too lazy to give them a proper name.

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I always feel like i have to eat something while watching a movie that I've seen so many times.

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I have to keep reading website pages until I reached 5, 10, 15 etc. When I get close to my age though, I can finish there.

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When riding in a car I pump my arms to pretend I'm running at an incredible rate.

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Wanting to marry Tyler Joseph but then you remember he's married :(

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This song will not come out of my head!

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get embarrassed when someone is in the public bathroom, and your shit makes a splash in the toilet

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I enjoy my company, I love myself, which is contagious, people around me enjoy my company, and love themselves. Moral: Thumb me down and prove you are a sad fuck TODAY!

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When I do something stupid and people are around I hope that nobody saw me and I never tell anyone what I did. But if i do something stupid and I am alone I feel I have to tell somebody.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.