I'm starting to ignore Hollywood, the news and experts opinions more and more.

Take nibbles whenever you get to the last piece of your burger to make it last longer.

When you know your alone, you still have to check the whole house.

Feeling like no one really "knows" me, but only what they already see/know. Most things about me my family don't know about.

Wonder if anyone doesn't actually talk to themselves for some reason or another at some point in their life. (If so, how can talking to yourself be the first sign of madness? So many people do it...)

I have to keep reading website pages until I reached 5, 10, 15 etc. When I get close to my age though, I can finish there.

when you get a runny nose suddenly checks for blood oh good its clear

When I'm reading a book and I come to a word that is long or difficult to pronounce every time I come to that word again I pronounce it 'manamanam'.

I apologize, when i bump against things.

Say 'she's not here' when someone that I don't know calls and asks for me.

I am sure that no one else has the same mental slowness as me and my brother. When I say mauve he says maeve and we continue like this for hours. It is certainly an exciting way of eating up those motorway miles:)

Wanting to marry Tyler Joseph but then you remember he's married :(

Run back into your room when your microwaving something

Drink half the water in a water bottle and then swish it around pretending to drown little people inside it.

wonder y nobody facebook likes or comments on these

When a stripper sucks you so hard that the tip of your penis gets circumcised

When I notice that I have just breathed in/out, for the next minute or so I feel like I have to make a conscious effort to keep breathing.

when you're microwaving something and you have to pee, you run to the bathroom. then you run back to see if there is still time left before the "bomb" goes off.

Play call of duty then go around shooting everyone in your mind for the rest of the day

I can't help but wonder why people write things on web sites and don't bother checking their spelling. Now they look like an idiot no matter how funny or interesting it might have been.

When I get a worksheet or a piece of paper with BIG TITLES I immediately shade in all of the gaps in the o's, p's, d's and all other 'hole letters'. And then I start shading in all the words when I finish.

I type a comment here and secretly feel special

push a fart out really slow so you think nobody will hear it

i always think people can hear my thoughts.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.