place all your achievements in your room to impress your friends

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Having sudden realizations that you are a person who exists.

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Pour the cheap shampoo I can only afford these days into the empty expensive bottle to trick myself I'm still using the good stuff.

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When I check into a hotel room I think about the countless number of sex acts that has been performed in there.

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Brake for tail-gaters

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you turn the dial on your microwave until it reaches as far as it can go

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In case you have the ears pierced, take out the piece, and smell it, even if it smells so bad, you like the how it smells... lol

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strt thinking about something spinning, then cant stop no matter how hard you try.

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Hide your I pod when your parents walk in at 12pm and then go back to what ever you were doing when they leave.

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Try to give my download speed moral support: "You can do it! YES, just stay there!" For anyone out there struggling with slow internet.. I feel your pain

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Imagine I'm walking in slow motion when I enter a bar or club

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Call the ninja turtles by their full names.

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Everytime I have ear buds in and I hear myself breathing, I think others can hear it too so I slow my breathing or hold my breath.

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push a fart out really slow so you think nobody will hear it

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Worry that I'm will go schizophrenic.

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Domina Olga shows no mercy when she ride your dick

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wait up to 14 days just to find the opportunity to use one, really good, joke.

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I wonder why the word ISLAND has an "S" in it?

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The girl I like has just managed to transfer her consciousness into my mind, now being to hear my every thought and see everything I do. Just. Act. Cool.

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start planning Halloween costumes on November first.

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Make the water from your shower shoot from your finger and pretend to be a water-bender.

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If I have my computer and I have to do something quietly (because there are other people about) I hear music in heaphones, just so it seems to myself that I'm more discreet, as I can't hear myself.

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I feel like people next to me can read my mind so if I start thinking about something sexual it feels super awkward

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The ability to go one hour back in time by concentrating really hard for two hours.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.