I brush my teeth while im in the shower

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When I was younger I used to think that Red bull was a drink that really did give you wings like they show in the commercials

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resting your head from your face to your hand and then you realize you face now looks disfigured.

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open the fridge A eat food B think

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realize you are saying your thoughts outloud.

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I like to burn candles in my room and some times I burn the hair on my arm and smell it afterwards

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Make a screeching noise with my mouth as I go around corners in my car too fast.

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If I'm at work and have to poop, when I get in the stall I look under the opening at the bottom for any other feet in the other stalls to make sure I am alone. I always think what if when I do that someone else does it at the same time.

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I have short haircuts so I don't have messed up hair in the morning (It's a real time saver)

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Back away as much as I can from airplane toilets before flushing them because the noise scares me

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Sometimes I make awkward eye contact with strangers. And I quickly look away. And then I look back. And then look away again. And I keep being compelled to stare awkwardly at the random stranger for no reason.

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Cough, whistle or hum while on the toilet for a time, just so anyone outside the door doesn't think I'm mastrubating.

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Waiting alone inside a public toilet for someone to come in and open the door.... so you don't have to touch the handle!

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Get to lazy to stand up in the shower so I sit down in the shower

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Put ear buds in nose, open mouth, instant speaker. If you don't do it try it.

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Whenever I see a girl, I always do the math for how good they would be for banging

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I used to drive home from my girlfriend's house late at night and stop on a stretch of road to take a leak. I'd walk backwards while peeing, creating a crooked line of pee in the road. I'd add to it night after night, then I'd drive by in the day to see my long pee stain in the road only I knew about. Anyone who passed by could see it, but only I knew what it was. It would last until the next rain and I'd have to start over.

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i feel relived after i prick and see that hard-white thinggy that oozes outside my annoying acne.

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whenever i'm talking about someone, i constantly check my phone to make sure i haven't butt-dialed them and they're listening to everything i'm saying about them!

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Race the microwave. Not literally, by the way.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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sometimes when i wipe my nose a booger will get on my hand then ill get to lazy to get it off and wipe it under my chair.

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when you're microwaving something and you have to pee, you run to the bathroom. then you run back to see if there is still time left before the "bomb" goes off.

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Spend several minutes to write a comment on a website, only to decide not no submit it after all.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.