When i see people even strangers , in my mind i wonder if there virgins or not .

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Wonder who decide what news stories we see and don't see?

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Will use delayed foot-to-ass insults on verbal bullies. You know, the kind that goes off in the persons head days or weeks after they thought they won an argument with me.

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when I'm lying in bed and I really have to fart, I lift up the blanket, stick my ass out and fart into the night air to keep the stench out of my bed

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Checking out peoples cars to try and figure out what kind of driver they are.

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I sometimes watch entire movies with the sound off and a good album playing.

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I look really handsome in my mirror, only to find myself looking weird in other mirrors, and like a total retard at photographies.

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when you dont know what someone said so you just awkwardly start laughing and it turns out not to be funny.

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interview yourself over some amazing accomplishment you achieved like becoming the youngest emmy winner and pretending you're really humble.

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when my mum buys way too much of something I imagine were one of those 'doomsday preppers' families, with mounds of supplies in our basement.

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Thinking about what other poeple are doing right now... Like someone solving world hunger and your sitting there playing games and having fun with friends that are nice and healthy.

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Whenever I'm holding two round objects, I try to juggle them.

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When you buy a car you then see that make/model everywhere.

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misread dig bick

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I brush my teeth in the shower and use the shower for a waterpik.

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Taking the little rings off the top of my bottles.

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Race the microwave. Not literally, by the way.

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I like to food shop between midnight and 5 am

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Think about all of the germs that are on restroom doors and water taps.

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imagine shooting lasers out from the car and bouncing them of walls and back to the car

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Do a light cough when in the toilet when there isn't no lock on the door so Ur stop someone walking in!!!

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im going to kill that person and get away with it

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When boarding the escalator, I select a specific step before getting on causing a slight queue.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.