i would air drum even if theres no music playing

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I see some one I have a crush on in the hallway and I walk towards them and brush my arm against them and be like OMG I TOUCHED HER!

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Feel all cool and look suspiciously at everybody else while leaving the theater after a good dramatic movie.

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Wonder if anyone doesn't actually talk to themselves for some reason or another at some point in their life. (If so, how can talking to yourself be the first sign of madness? So many people do it...)

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I brush my teeth in the shower and use the shower for a waterpik.

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I have an unhealthy obsession with and so always talk about Penge North Korea beige mauve and medium density fiberboard. This explains why I'm such a popular guy

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I think source beggars are lazy pest that should be groin kicked

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See a news article that looks interesting, too lazy to read the whole thing. Skim.

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When something weird happens I nod in agreement.

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Wonder who decide what news stories we see and don't see?

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when I'm lying in bed and I really have to fart, I lift up the blanket, stick my ass out and fart into the night air to keep the stench out of my bed

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open the fridge A eat food B think

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Domina Olga shows no mercy when she ride your dick

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I hate it whenever i hear Manny Paquiao saying "you know" in every interviews he make. Am i the only one who notice it?

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I hate people who shows-off their SLR Cameras. I mean, so you're a human now because of that?

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Think about what to say to the person you like and never actually say it .

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Whenever I'm holding two round objects, I try to juggle them.

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Randomly agree for the Terms of Service for just about everything on the internet. Then becoming very frightened at the thought that you have violated them in some way.

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Fap and when you're done you feel ashamed and feel like you're wasting your life lol

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When reading something you have different voices for the characters/people.

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Thinking you could bump into someone by the corner of a building (or a wall)

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I eat ass

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always check thde back seat before starting the car

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When I'm home alone at night, and the lights are on so you can't see anything out the windows, I will stop randomly and stare out the window to make anyone watching me think I know that they are there.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.