slow down in front of automatic doors thinking they won't open and then rushing through when they do so you don't look stupid

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Get excited when the clock reads 12:34. especially when its a digital that can also read 12:34.56.

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When im in a public toilet, i try not to make any sounds when taking a crap, not even a fart, so that when i come out no one will think i was taking a crap.

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I only make the tv volume in multiples of 5.

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After waking up from being extremely intoxicated the night before, i check my phone and ALL my accounts on the internet to make sure i didnt make an ass of myself.

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Stalk boyfriend's facebook, go to everything he's commented on, and comment too.

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Forgetting the same word over and over again and having a spaz attack when you can't remember it for more than a couple of seconds.

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watch cartoons even though most of my friends don't

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you look at someone and they look toward you and you look away quickly then you look back to see if they are still looking.

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Listen to music while browsing the internet, having facebook open in another tab, and randomly you hear facebook message sounds, even though they aren't really there.

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Doing a little dance after having sex because your so proud you're a FATHER!!! - Uncle Jerrett

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Search "sex" whenever you see a dictionary.

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If some makes you mad you do things alot better than you would if you were not mad

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feed a gecko worms every day, not the good worms though...

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Write a post and then find that someone else has already said it, but in a different way...wtf I'm really annoyed. And they have more likes too.

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When I step on something pokey, I don't say the quick "OW" that is expected, I go the extra syllable and a say "JOW!"

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Living in the shadow of an atheletic friend, and secretly wanting to beat them up just to prove that you're as good as they are.

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When I'm walking on the sidewalks, I make a game of how to walk on the pavement squares so I don't step on a line.

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hug the pillow at night so it protects me from monsters

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Seriously I am tired but, I read the fucking solvemedia stating "forget this", then I stood there for a moment having just forgot what I was supposed to type. "Was I not supposed to forget what I just read?" Nero: BRAINWASHING! FORGET THIS AND LET ME SPEAK TO YOUR MOTHER! IM LEUTANANT BANGUS YOUR MUTHERUS YOU IDIOT!

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every single time a sad song comes on your ipod you imagine yourself in a movie, gloomily looking out a window or sitting alone on a bench.

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ur parents never pay attention to u but when they do they r yelling at u

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Look at the clock to realize that it seems like the "second" hand is taking longer on the number its on right when you look at it, and/or you looked at the clock at the absolute perfect time. And it happens frequently..

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look at old toys from when you were a kid and remember how they taste.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.