When I'm sleeping, I turn and my bed shakes, and I wake up thinking it's an earthquake.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

When you get in trouble, think of what you could have said or done so you could've gotten away with it.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Pick my scabs off and then lick the blood off.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Turn the fan and/or sink on in the bathroom to drown out the noise from masturbating.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

being super bored at school

thumb_up thumb_down -45

getting self conscious when wearing a hoodie because you start pitting out and you can start to smell BO...

thumb_up thumb_down -47

Secretly think that Flo from the Progressive commercials is bangable.

thumb_up thumb_down -49

sometime i poop in my hand, then put it in the toilet so it makes less noise and the water doesn't splash up my butt.

thumb_up thumb_down -55

Listen to music while browsing the internet, having facebook open in another tab, and randomly you hear facebook message sounds, even though they aren't really there.

thumb_up thumb_down -61

masturbate quietly in my room.

thumb_up thumb_down -79

Look at the clock to realize that it seems like the "second" hand is taking longer on the number its on right when you look at it, and/or you looked at the clock at the absolute perfect time. And it happens frequently..

thumb_up thumb_down -123

Try to balance on and off on the light switch.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Writing d as b and b as d or p as q

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Being the only one laughing at something on TV, then feeling awkward.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

When im in a public toilet, i try not to make any sounds when taking a crap, not even a fart, so that when i come out no one will think i was taking a crap.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

I seriously contemplate what my theme song would be. I imagine it would have no words and a slight Mission Impossible influence.

thumb_up thumb_down

Can't seem to manage not throwing rocks into sea/river

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Sometimes, after I say "bye" to a person on facebook, I wait a few seconds before I log off so that it seems like I said "bye" to other people too. Because I'm just that popular.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

I have short haircuts so I don't have messed up hair in the morning (It's a real time saver)

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Randomly think odd scenarios in your head and say if that happened this is what i would do and then forget about it the next day

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Spending the night at someone's house and waking up and thinking your at your house then realizing your not

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Living in the shadow of an atheletic friend, and secretly wanting to beat them up just to prove that you're as good as they are.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Point your finger to the sky When your favorite comes on in the club or on the radio

thumb_up thumb_down -34

I tend to stand in front of mirrors and stare at myself to the point of my face changing to a more evil look than normal and freaking myself out, and forcing myself to either look away, or down.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.