when watching a movie in a big screen cinema, i unconsciously look at the bottom of the screen, midway through the movie, expecting to see a time/track/scroll bar. as if it was VLC media player.

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Sweep up the dirt into the dustpan and sweep the stuff you can't get under the cabinet.

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KICK THE CAN

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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When the car ride is silent, I wink with my right eye when I pass a sign on the right, and the opposite for the left. And then when there's a double yellow line, I close my eyes.

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Turn the fan and/or sink on in the bathroom to drown out the noise from masturbating.

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I've had a problem all my life with people thinking I'm a boy, (I'm a girl) so when I first meet someone, my instinct is to find some reason, (however stupid) to say that I'm a girl, (EX: "Can you believe that people actually think I'm a boy?" like when I just meet them).

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I sometimes see or think of words and pronounce them differently. ie. Garbage, gar-bah-ge ("ge" like a vibration sound), Target, tar-jhay

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Smelling your armpits to see if you smell and then disguising at as yawn/stretch

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Check my underwear for any sh!t from farts (yes, sometimes my shit comes with a fart) captcha: royal flush

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Drop something down the side of the couch, say that you'll get it in a minute and then forget about it

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Read for hours... then hear a narrative for everything you do after you stop reading. for ex: "Jen gets out of the car, shutting it with a loud bang. She walks towards the house, noticing the dead squirrel in the road."

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I use two pillows as I sleep, but I don't put them under my head, I put my head in between them.

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Scared to flush the tolite at friends houses in fear that i will wake someone up of break the tolite.

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DAS RITE MODERFOCKER! NOWUN MESSIS WIF FIRLUPE!!' (throws wine in face)

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go on a diet, buy a lot of healthy food, eat it all the same day. 2 weeks later repeat.

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hug the pillow at night so it protects me from monsters

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Pee in the shower.

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get really embarrassed when i leave the book i read when i poop on the bathroom counter and someone uses the bathroom.

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Sometimes I forget that there are spiders in my bedroom, so after I've seen one I can't sleep for several days for fear that they'll eat me if I do. Then I forget about them again and thus the cycle starts.

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I always think I have special powers

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Awkward moment... Pretend to send a text.

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When making something I pretend I'm making a YouTube video of it and pretend I am getting lots of views

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.