Smile like a damn dork when I watch romantic movies.

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Sitting next to a banana called James

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When im going from one room to the next, i try and get into the other room before the door to the last room closes. If i do, I've won.

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I look for comments in this site that are on or close to 0 so that when i like or dislike them, i make a difference to the outcome :)

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Scratch my ass/armpit and HAVE to smell it.

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Before I go to sleep, I imagine what it would be like dating a really hot actor or singer and think of dramatic scenarios that could happen.

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Cry every day just because it makes you feel better.

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Awkward moment... Pretend to send a text.

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Sunday's are making me feel depressed.

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When I watch a movie that terrifies me, I usually find myself sitting on the sofa with a kitchen knife in my hand at the end of the movie.

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Look at restaurant signs and realize the font isnt as fancy as you once thought

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I like to eat grilled cheese with ketchup

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Pubic hair wishes... While on the toilet you try to pull out a hair... If it comes out close your eyes and make a wish....and throw it into the toilet... Flush... Repeat!

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When I go to use my laptop if my cat is sleeping in my chair I would use it somewhere else and leave her alone.

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See a ridiculously hot girl and wonder to myself "who is the guy who gets to have sex with her. And why does she like him?" As if that can help me bag an equally hotter girl.

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KICK THE CAN

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look around my house for something to do for what feels like an hour then look back at a clock to realize thats its only been 4 minutes

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I sometimes see or think of words and pronounce them differently. ie. Garbage, gar-bah-ge ("ge" like a vibration sound), Target, tar-jhay

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get really embarrassed when i leave the book i read when i poop on the bathroom counter and someone uses the bathroom.

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I daydream and consequently spend twenty minutes having a dump

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Search "sex" whenever you see a dictionary.

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When my friends talk bout a show they ask did u see the one where they did this and I nod even thow I have no idea what they're talking about

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After going to the bathroom, flush the toilet than hurry out of the bathroom and walk fast past a certain line going across the floor or make an imaginary line on the floor before the toilet fully flushes.

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I seriously contemplate what my theme song would be. I imagine it would have no words and a slight Mission Impossible influence.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.