i draw pictures of pokemon on comments (\____/) (??????)

dream about the most amazing guy/girl that you have a relationship with and hope it comes true

When alone in a public restroom, after using the toilet I kick the lever and run away out of fear that it will splash on me.

Check my underwear for any sh!t from farts (yes, sometimes my shit comes with a fart) captcha: royal flush

When ever a door is about to close I always try to put my hand between the door and stop it, but it gets to small and I get scared.

When I'm waiting for someone who is late. I go-over in my head how I'm going to greet them. For example "Well, it's about damn time", or "Finally!".

When I'm getting shouted out i blur my eyes and think of something else :3

Try to think of as many as my female friends as literally possible while masturbating. Rapid Fire envisioning each one I can think of - regardless of their attractiveness - taking my load in one place or another, until I actually cum.

I use my phone's auto-correct to make sure the words I'm writing are correct.

When I read something someone you know has written I read it in their voice.

when u were younger and closed the fridge door super slowly 2 c when the light turned off

Accidentally make a weird noise and quickly turn around frantically to see if anyone else hear it.

Get angry at someone for not knowing something I haven't told them about.

When you Sitting on the couch and say "I am hungry" but then don't do anything because you are too lazy.

Sweep up the dirt into the dustpan and sweep the stuff you can't get under the cabinet.

Still can't walk on cracks. If I step on the crack with one foot, the other has to as well.

Show desktop when mom or dad walks in.

When you were in elementary school you thought people laughed at Uranus because it sounds kinda like urine and then wondered why it was so funny; the two only sound remotely alike.

that movie-like moment when you want to rush out to dance in the rain

hug the pillow at night so it protects me from monsters

whenever I play I spy I always use very specific things I spy for example if I would say something starting with D and it would be for dust

Put your feet up on the wall when you can't get to sleep

smoke marijuana

in the morning the first thing I do is pick my nose n eat it n then I smell my discharge

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.