When you're lying in bed and you fart, you pull the covers over your head to smell it.

I eat something and read book/newspaper/magazine at the same time. Then i take food crumbs off the book and eat them too.

When at a restaurant you practice your order inside your head, then when you actually have to order you mess it up.

Tell myself that I'm only going for a 20 minute nap and end up sleeping for 1/+ hour(s)...

Try to find the perfect stride length so you don't have to walk all weird to avoid stepping on a sidewalk crack. Fail miserably but keep walking weird.

Try to figure out if some of the posts were written by the same person.

i pull for the chicken when peter and the chicken fight on family guy cause peter is a jackhole

judge a spider on it's ability to hide from me and decide to let it survive if I consider it a clever hiding place, then get paranoid because the spider was smart.

I don't read the terms of service.

i talk to myself in the mirror just to see how i look when im talking to somebody else, i even practice faces and my laugh (i should get a life)

If I'm walking with or behind someone I always match their footsteps

Going to sleep during class thinking that you've written down all your notes, until you wake up and realize you did nothing.

If my SOLVE media is too long I refresh it to give me a shorter one

If I'm in the car looking for an address or a street name I'll turn down the radio. Why?

Try to move your head to line up specks on the windshield with objects outside.

jump down the stairs when im almost down to save time

(1) In the middle of a conversation, I start to think of all the crazy stuff I could do even though I would never want to i.e. punching them in the face, making out with them, flashing them.

I think something is gonna get me at night when I walk out of my brothers roomso I look behind me and run and usually bump into a wall

fap

when im in the toilet and invent something in my mind and dont have a pen and paper to wright my invention and when im done i forget about it...

Whenever I get in the shower, no matter what, I always have to pee.

Drive slow in straightaways and fast through curves, especially sharp ones.

Deside to watch a video in bed on your phone or iPad and drop it on your face...

Fake an orgasm after only 30 seconds, watch the "wtf" look on her face then laugh hysterically.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.