try and open the microwave right before it finishes.

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I always have trouble leaving a airplanes lavatory I never get the door open

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Being fat

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Imagine myself going back in time and giving my friends and family little hints on how their life will pan out.

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Make calculations with house number. Eg: House nº 112 means house nº 4

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i masturbate with my feet

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Write a word then wonder if it's spelt with an i or and e so just put them both in but do it in such a way that the person reading it won't know whether you didn't know the spelling or misspelled it then realized your mistake and tried to fix it.

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I have autofocus in my eyes.

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When passed by a very attractive girl in the street, turn around and look after her and/or follow her to the next street corner, in order to grasp more of her beauty.

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All of my friends go to halloween parties. I still go trick or treating.

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When I watch porn, I only watch like the first 5-10 minutes of it. To be honest I wonder why people bother making them longer too.

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I was not born in the country I am living in now

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stare at someone then when they turn around look all around the room pretending you weren't looking at them

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I hate it when people assume I'm smart just because I don't speak much and I wear glasses.

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When you're scared of the bathroom and you close your eyes you quickly look around to check if there's a monster or something in the mirror

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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....you're high and you think you write complete bullshit?

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I was the real Stig...

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Sometimes I wait a long time to pee when I really have to go. It feels good.

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I have a phobia of incest

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Make up a song to yourself.

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When you're walking along at night and you see the moon, then you move around quickly,still looking at it as if you're controlling it.

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Lightly touching your stomach or other body parts with your fingers to get that tickling sensation.

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Playing a sad song that talks about your current situation and then looking in the mirror or out the window pretending you are in a sad music video.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.