Imagin what would happen if there was a zombie invasion just at your house.

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expecting to get on this website to find something funny but instead finding crappy posts.

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I always have trouble leaving a airplanes lavatory I never get the door open

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I like to turn the lights off in the bathroom, actually block every little bit of light I possibly can, then take a nice warm shower, curl up on the floor, block my ears and enjoy the warm water and sensory deprivation.

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I love to garden and I love flowers. I refuse to have a window box because I don't want those creepy Sesame Street twiddlebugs to live that close to my house.

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Looking up your teachers on facebook just to look at their photos

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Layer the water in the toilet with toilet paper, so when I poo the water does splash back up and splatter poo and water all over my bum

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Kill Jb without getting aressted.

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Use a signature that automatically gets me hundreds of red thumbs... Yeah that moral crap...

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Sorry I posted last comment 3 times. And it is best ever not beat ever.

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I can't piss with my shoes on.

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send a text to some one and act like you "meant" to send it to someone else.

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I find that whenever I go somewhere it always seems to take longer than when I come back home

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Boy:did it hurt? Me: Did what hurt? Boy:When you fell from heaven. Me: I came frome the pits of hell! Boy: Well then...O__O

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Watch peoples body language and see if they're on the same pace of thought as i am and then try to speed up my thinking to pretend or act like I am realizing something they are not.

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Sometimes when I'm bored I start shouting things in German.

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When someone wants to kill a bug, I'll get insane and catch the bug, then run out and release the bug while saying "NOW YOU'RE FREE!!!!!"

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Walk down the street, listening to a song, singing it softly, then thinking 'I might wanna stop doing that before I look awkward', but the wires get crossed and you start singing LOUDER and so on.

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When Ive already talked to somebody , I think of things I couldve said to make the converstion better

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I don't like being told what I will do or how I will feel.

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I sleep in my underpants every single night

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Think something you shouldn't about someone, stop thinking about it in case they read your mind, and then, as an added precaution, think "I know you listening".

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Tells a joke only you thought was funny and still laughs then laughs harder because your the only one laughing nikki

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Intentionally utilize uncommon vocabulary to replace colloquial slang for the pure purpose of entertainment (for oneself). :D

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.