You're taking a poo, and you're bored. You use your thighs as drums to pass the time.

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When I hear footsteps approaching while I'm sitting on the toilet, I'm getting ready to jump at the door in case I actually forgot to lock it.

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I wonder what it wonder be like to have a really tall girlfriend?

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Chewing your chips softer so you can hear the tv

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Take your laptop to the toilet with you, as a modern day equivalent of the newspaper.

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Sniff or tap to a rhythm to some sort of beat I composed in my head...

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Fantasize about shooting one of those trucks that have some sort of liquid in them and watching them blow up.

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You think about all the stupid things you did in elementary school and avoid anyone who went to your elementary school in high school.

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it is not disgusting to bite your toe nails, it is a skill

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Sleep with pillow between legs

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i absolutely hate the number nine, and when i told my brother this i was like "sometimes i wish i could delete the number 9" and hes like "but then youd have 9 numbers" and i was like..... "FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU"

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(I have made this mistake mostly when I'm at the movies) When the cashier gives me the ticket and says enjoy the movie because I am so used to people saying have a nice day I say you too!(FACE PALM)

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When you think about your life then think your parents had to have sex to make you. Then start thinking about all the gross old teachers you've had that probably had sex. Then when you get older your parents tell you about all the times they had sex when you were in the house.

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Turn off light in bed... notice something you haven't seen before. IT'S SLENDERMAN You turn the light back on and realized it was a lamp

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When i talk i say i like how or i hate that.

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wipe your armpit and then sniff it to see how bad you smell

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I randomly hold my boobs in my room.

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Help my dogs eat their dinner....I think the whole time, "If they only had thumbs".....

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I pee on the bathroom sink everytime, because I am lazy to open the toilet, even when I visit other people, sorry friends and family =)

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when I go shopping I go in the store, get what I need and then I leave I don't browse.

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when you're fapping and thinking about someone, you either get a text from them moments later, or stop thinking about them because you feel like they are reading your mind.

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Listening to my iPod with other people walking by me or sitting near me and feeling mysterious and cool.

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Twice on two different internet super power sites, I posted sdrawkcab epyt ot REWEP eth"... ...Sadly I forgot to type MORAL under them, so they have... several thumbs ups... NERO: In a world of bithes and h0m0f*gs that never understood that my "MORALS" where pure SARCASM!... Oh, I also think I am one of the three hundred guys that gangbang your mother.

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when someones child falls and cries while you walking through town and you laugh to yourself

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.