Stab myself on a daily basis

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When bored in School, I like to imagine what I would do at that exact moment if a Zombie Apocalypse started.

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Love the natural smell of my dog's paws.

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I hit the frig after sex

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I feel strange when I look at someone and think ''This person has had sex''

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I put a cigarette lighter in a fireplace, anyone else?

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When you Saigon the couch and say "I am hungry" but then don't do anything because you are too lazy.

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Pretend to listen to music, but just do it so nobody talks to me or i simply just ignore them.

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Do somthing only you do

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Whenever i do something bad to someone I can't stop smiling even though i never wanted to smile in the first place and i feel like people think I'm a terrible person

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When it's as quiet as possible in the classroom in the middle of the period and everyone is silently doing their work.... I suddenly think of something REALLY funny and spend the next half hour awkwardly grinning trying my hardest not to burst out uncontrollably.

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Go to bed with my left nostril clogged, wake up with my right nostril clogged.

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I think some songs would be better if they didn't put a rap in with them

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If I have to get up early the following day I will surprisingly wake up early even without an alarm

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Put the towel near the shower so that you can stand on it and not get the floor wet

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play Simpsons episodes in my head...way too often

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i absolutely hate the number nine, and when i told my brother this i was like "sometimes i wish i could delete the number 9" and hes like "but then youd have 9 numbers" and i was like..... "FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU"

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Dutch oven myself when I'm lying in bed trying to sleep

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Feeling sorry for inanimate objects

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When I'm walking in the street and I hear a car coming from behind I try to beat it by running to the closest telephonepole.

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It takes me a whole afternoon to write an important/professional email cause i keep thinking about what I should and should not write and it gets so stupidly difficult I take one hour breaks between every sentence.

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I feel that getting a 98 on a test is better than getting a 99.

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I put toilet paper in first before i poop, so the water dosent splash me.

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Sometimes I turn on my bedroom fan at night just so i can use heavier blankets.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.