I always have to remake my bed right before going to sleep in it

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I hold my breath in elevators

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I put the volume on my television so it is on any number divisible by five (5-10-15 etc. etc.)

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Solving your problems in bed before sleeping and then forgetting all of the solutions when you wake up. This applies to games, homework, and world hunger.

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Right before I go to the dentist I brush my teeth.

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When something funny happens think of it a couple days later than laugh,everyone then looks at me weirdly.

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When a passneger in the car, I sing songs in my head and hope the song is in time with the signs and streetlights as I drive past them.

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Sometimes I reflect on my life and just feel humiliated.

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Manage to be more AWESOME! THAN YOU IN EVERY SINGLE WAY! YES YOU! YOU DONT HIDE FROM ME! YEAH CHANGE THE PAGE LIKE THE PUSSY YOU ARE, COME OVER HERE INTO THE SCREEN (NOT HOME IM NAKED AND NOT IN THE MOOD FOR RAPING NOW SO YEAH ANYWAY) MORAL; THE ORIGINAL NOT THE CULT MORAL CODE FUCK ASSHOLE OKAY? DO I SEEM LIKE I WANT A CULT? OR THAT I JUST WANT TO CHAINSAW THE HEAD OF YOUR DOG AND PACK IT IN A NICE GIFT BOX FOR YOU? HUUUUUH!?

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When I'm on a site that requires you to login with Facebook or Twitter to leave a comment, I click on the names of the nice looking ones to go see their pages to add them to my friends list.

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I make sims of everyone I know and make them have kids together.

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Everytime my sibling starts a sentance with "I remember when","I have an idea"etc.,I get up and walk out.

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Until just recently, I thought apple juice was made by the pee of the company. Just that they added sugar.

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i pull for the chicken when peter and the chicken fight on family guy cause peter is a jackhole

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Whenever on a car ride, pretend you are in a military convoy and shoot at pursuing helicopters and soldiers.

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I use the internet to validate that weirdness is not actually weird at all.

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Try to figure out if some of the posts were written by the same person.

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I cant ride a bike

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i talk to myself in the mirror just to see how i look when im talking to somebody else, i even practice faces and my laugh (i should get a life)

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Sometimes when I kill a bug, i wrap it up in a giant wad of paper towels, put it in a plastic sandwich bag, THEN throw it away. just in case...

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Instead of reading the sunday comics, I read the nutrition facts on the cereal box.

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go to the search engine suggestions and see what people found, then type them in to see if you get the same results

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You think someone is reading your mind and hurriedly change what your thinking to something normal

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when passing someone in a car beside you, you try to wonder where they are going just by looking at them, their clothes or their expressions

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.