I talk through my teeth when i am talking to my pets.

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I have memorized my drivers license registration number

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trying not to laugh when reading things that you do in "Things You Only Think You Do" in fear your parents will mistake your laughter as you fapping.

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Inspect the shower, bath or toilet, then washing it until you believe it is suitable to use.

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I like to turn the lights off in the bathroom, actually block every little bit of light I possibly can, then take a nice warm shower, curl up on the floor, block my ears and enjoy the warm water and sensory deprivation.

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I TALK WITH PEDOBEAR ABOUT OUR BUSINESS ;)

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Discovering your friend is an indian (Nicole)

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What do you call a rapist in your house? Your father.

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All of my friends go to halloween parties. I still go trick or treating.

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Turn volume down on iPod or tv, then turn up one bar to make it seem like it's still loud.

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When you don't have enough money for something, you just take a tiny bit of money from your siblings and parents room at a time so they don't notice any different

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Slowly close the fridge door to see when the light bulb turns off.

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I wake up right before the "sexy" part happens...

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I **** with no hands.

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Walk down the street, listening to a song, singing it softly, then thinking 'I might wanna stop doing that before I look awkward', but the wires get crossed and you start singing LOUDER and so on.

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You are thinking of really awkward moments that happened earlier in the day so then you subconsciously say a bunch of random things quickly out loud to get the thought of the awkward moment out of your head.

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When dunking oreos I like to hold it under the milk and watch the bubbles til they stop

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Make up a song to yourself.

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Lightly touching your stomach or other body parts with your fingers to get that tickling sensation.

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Go for a 10 mile run.

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When you lie in bed and imagine scenarios that will never happen.

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I wonder what it wonder be like to have a really tall girlfriend?

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You're taking a poo, and you're bored. You use your thighs as drums to pass the time.

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Hate when people ask "do you have a bathroom?" It's like "no we crap in the yard!"

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.