- Things You Think Only You Do

Think that the person driving keeps staring at me when ever they look in the mirror and I'm sat in the back.

You're taking a poo, and you're bored. You use your thighs as drums to pass the time.

Hate when people ask "do you have a bathroom?" It's like "no we crap in the yard!"

Being the only one laughing at something on TV, then feeling awkward.

when i wake up from a dream and it was an amazing dream. then i try to fall back asleep to have it again...it doesn't work

Chewing your chips softer so you can hear the tv

Sometimes I have something I want to do and then walk into the room to do it in and forget exactly what I was trying to do, it usually involves the kitchen so I just look in the refrigerator then leave and then remember what it is I wanted to do.

Go to bed with my left nostril clogged, wake up with my right nostril clogged.

Think that my ice tastes different than my water.

Use my phone to see what time it is

When someone close to me sadly passes on and later when I am listening to the radio if I hear a song that sounds suitable to that moment I kind of make that our song if that makes sense to any of you

While I Am on the computer late at night, my Mum tells me to go to bed, I say I will in a second. I stay for a few more minutes, my mum tells me again, I do the same thing...

Try to make a turd that touches the bottom of the toilet before it breaks off.

When my girlfriend ask me what I am thinking about, I tell her I am thinking of all the great things about my last girlfriend.

wake up in the middle of the night and write your dream if you like it. Or just write all night and dont sleep all night for days at a time.

When I'm in the car I imagine I'm Superman flying along next to the car, whipping under, over and around traffic signs, trees, and fences. Sometimes I then fly up above the traffic a little. Then I get worried I will cause a traffic accident because people will be watching me instead of the road. I've done this since I was a kid. I'm 45 now and I still do it! Sometimes I'm Spider-Man, swing and jumping from truck to truck, car to car to keep moving fast along the highway. And lately, sometimes I do the Superman flying thing, but as Iron Man.

I pee on the bathroom sink everytime, because I am lazy to open the toilet, even when I visit other people, sorry friends and family =)

Wonder what random strangers look like or noises and such they make while having sex. Everyone literally. People you interact with at work , customers, your boss, the married couple. Except for people who are like dirty looking af. Our just straight up ugly. Then your like grossed out by those thoughts your having and start getting that home sickfeeling in your stomach. Almost like butterflies but like dead ones or something. Hard to explain.

Playing hide-and-seek and finding the best spot ever, only to realize you have to pee

sometimes when im in the shower and i hear the slightest bump i look behind the curtains to see if anyone is about to scare me

after brushing my teeth I chew on the granules that are on my teeth

Change the channel when a Progressive commercial comes on because I can't STAND that stupid Flo girl.

Sometimes I blink and act like I am taking a picture with my eyes.

when I go shopping I go in the store, get what I need and then I leave I don't browse.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.