When I Download A Song Or Movie And The Download Speed Slows Down I Think The FBI Is Tracking Me.

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Sometimes I have something I want to do and then walk into the room to do it in and forget exactly what I was trying to do, it usually involves the kitchen so I just look in the refrigerator then leave and then remember what it is I wanted to do.

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Use my phone to see what time it is

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Thinking epic thoughts like "Man, had a great workout today" just in case someone is reading my mind.

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hover over public toilets and end up leaving a sprinkling of pee that lands uniformly all over on the seat then use a big wad of TP and my foot to wipe down the seat.

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I wonder what a baby is laughing about when they are apparently being entertained by something in the room I can't see

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You look over the edge of a tall building/structure, and have that sudden urge to jump off.

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Try stick to something but fail in the end

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I don't like to meet people when I'm well dressed because that's not me all of the time.

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(I have made this mistake mostly when I'm at the movies) When the cashier gives me the ticket and says enjoy the movie because I am so used to people saying have a nice day I say you too!(FACE PALM)

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When i talk i say i like how or i hate that.

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Whenever I go to close the door to my room, I give the wall opposite me a hard, intimidating stare just in case an invisible person was watching me.

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Try to acomplish getting the rest of your meal reaady before the microwave timer goes off.

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Lay between the wall and the bed when the bed is pefectly fine

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It takes me a whole afternoon to write an important/professional email cause i keep thinking about what I should and should not write and it gets so stupidly difficult I take one hour breaks between every sentence.

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play Simpsons episodes in my head...way too often

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Without thinking i ask questions i know the answer to

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when someones child falls and cries while you walking through town and you laugh to yourself

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When in a outhouse I get scared that I can't unlock the door. This one time in the winter the lock froze and I was almost stuck

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Learning a definition of a word and after that seeing it everywhere.

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Be a loner at school

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Sometimes when I fart while sitting down, I lift one leg up.

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I still put my thumb in my mouth, BUT only because I like the feel of putting my eye lashes under my fingernails and my thumb inconveniantly fits in my mouth. Now I know I'm the only person in the world who does this. I'm trying to drop the habit. But it feels so GOOD!

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Wonder what random strangers look like or noises and such they make while having sex. Everyone literally. People you interact with at work , customers, your boss, the married couple. Except for people who are like dirty looking af. Our just straight up ugly. Then your like grossed out by those thoughts your having and start getting that home sickfeeling in your stomach. Almost like butterflies but like dead ones or something. Hard to explain.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.