have you ever thought of a relative when masturbating?

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When your at your friends house and they run out of toilet paper, so you sit there like "what do i do now?"

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Drum on the chair between your legs and wonder if people think that you're playing with yourself.

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Cringe when remembering something weird about you that happened years ago

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k. everyone

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I think Frozen is an overrated film

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I Masturbate Daily.

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Scratch inside my ear, then lick the finger I used.

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when you are at home doing something then all of a sudden you imagine how you would take down a killer if he came into your home right now. just me?

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(okay maybe not a thing I do but something I noticed) When people call themselves "Writers" In today's world you know that might not be the case because we have computers so shouldn't they be called typers?

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Fire imaginary rocket launchers at passenger planes flying overhead, then panic thinking what if it really blows up?

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try to give your friends spirit animals

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Wish that illegal Mexicans would stop driving drunk and uninsured and killing innocent legal people or injuring them for life and leaving them in medical debt.

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Sometimes I blow my nose on yesterday's socks because it is the closest thing to the bed in the morning and I'm too lazy to get up and go for a tissue. O_o

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When I piss in the toilet (naw, naw in the microwave, god) I try to pee on one side so the bubbles spin around the flush to see if it keeps spinning

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I think of doing something productive, but can't work up the motivation and end up on the internet instead.

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Press harder on the remote when I know the batteries are dead.

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.don't congratulate someone on facebook until someone other does, because maybe it's a fail.

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When no one is around, kick a push door open to feel like a badass.

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Feeling sorry for objects to throw away!! Haha anyone els?

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When my girlfriend ask me what I am thinking about, I tell her I am thinking of all the great things about my last girlfriend.

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Save more than once on your favourite game.

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TV turned on just so... Makes you not feeling alone or because some other unknown (or) irrational reason.And of course, feeling guilty cause you spending energy and money but still... Most of the time you just don't care.

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You always go to the corner of the shower when the cold water is running.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.