- Things You Think Only You Do

If people knew what I am really thinking about while they are talking to me... YIKES!

see a old couple in the street and think," i wonder if he still bangs her" lol

jump down the stairs when im almost down to save time

Sneeze for a few minutes when I've eaten too much.

Ur mum

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Pretending there is a man running beside you during a long car journey and jumping over obstacles

Count the number of times someone knocks on a door on television.

Write angry notes into your search browser in case any Russian spies are watching.

Use a signature that automatically gets me hundreds of red thumbs... Yeah that moral crap...

Having to poop in a certain way to avoid your ass sucking it in again. If it all comes out in one go, the cleaning becomes a lot easier and more satisfying.

Hate when I can't sleep and the sun starts to come up and I hear birds chirping and i get worried and just realize that I should be happy that it's a new day and to relax.

Pretend you and your classmates are in a Hunger Games scenario.

HEY! YOU! Yeah you! I can speak you only, NO! Nobody else here! Yeah you only you, by the way you are a dirty piece of s**t you mothe* F**ker! YEAH ITS YOU! I HATE YOU! EVERYBODY HATES YOU YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU! end of special message just for you

Play call of duty then go around shooting everyone in your mind for the rest of the day

make south park refferences every day

Thinking about a situation someone else in the world might be in. For example, Someone dying and the pain they must be going through.

When I'm watching something interesting on TV, sometimes i realize they I'm making a weird face so i make sure that i make my face go back to its normal position. This way, my face won't get stuck like that

When im alone i rub myself in vasaline and pretend that im a slug on the kitchen floor.

Whenever I think of something creative or weird, I always wonder if someone thought of the same thing.

(okay maybe not a thing I do but something I noticed) When people call themselves "Writers" In today's world you know that might not be the case because we have computers so shouldn't they be called typers?

Love to check my astrological compatibility with my favorite musicians.

I find that whenever I go somewhere it always seems to take longer than when I come back home

Layer the water in the toilet with toilet paper, so when I poo the water does splash back up and splatter poo and water all over my bum

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.