rub your face on your legs after shaving to feel how smooth they are.

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I gotta get down of Friday

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Go to bed at 9 am and then regret whole day is wasted

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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as you walk down the street, you pretend that all of the people were zombies and you pretend you have a gun and give them headshots (even imitate the gunshot with your mouth) -MATT

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after you've been in a fight i usually think up some epic move i could've done instead.

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Say something in my head, but then wonder if i said it out loud and just didn't realize.

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have fake conversations that might happen in the future...so ur prepared

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Read things from this page and think to self: "Thank God, I thought I was the only one."

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Get bored of regular porn and watch some bestiality just for the variation.

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whenever i'm holding a kitchen knife, i feel super weird like i'm gonna stab someone.... its not like i would ever do that, but i think about what would happen if i just impaled the person that is standing near me with a huge knife.

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If someone tells me what I did when I was drinking and it's stupid or embarrassing I pretend I don't remember because I was too drunk.

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Whenever I hear someone say a word in a way that I like, I repeat it.

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Have to have a certain light in the bathroom to poop. Also, nobody can be anywhere near me.

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I sometime's wonder if other people can see and feel everything I can but are just in my body too judge me.

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When I'm laying in bed in the dark and I close my eyes for a while then when I open them again I quickly scan for a light source just to make sure I can still see.

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Run the shower before you get in/ move out the way of the water to let it warm up first

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Pretend i'm a sim.

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Whenever I'm chewing on gum that has lost its flavor, I extract the gum from my mouth using my fingers before putting it back in so the flavor would return.

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Scratching with the wife's/girlfriends hair brush.

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I often think about how I am a thing inside of a body

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after seeing toy story, and watching that toys moved and talked to each other when the humans werent around, thinking that toys are really like that when you gone, and when you go back to you room, the toys rush back into their spots.

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When calling someone you hang up after 3 or 4 rings because you're tired of waiting rather than it being time to leave a message.

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forget to breathe while listening to ear buds too loudly.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.