For some reason some guy at the office started calling me "Biggus Dickus" and that became my nickname from there on... ...Cant help but smirk whenever my female employees gather and ask one another "But what is that Biggus Dickus guys real name? Is he really "Biggus Dickus? Such a strange name, should we call him Biggus Dickus or? etc" Nero the clit collector: AND THEY WONDER WHY I REFUSE TO TELL THEM MY REAL NAME XD They even have bets to see which one can guess "Biggus Dickus`s" real name... ...WHAT? YOU COLLECT STAMPS! THATS TWICE AS CRUEL... Besides you got like ten, I got about 300.005.

Always cover yourself in the bathroom mirror at home because you have this strange feeling that people at school are all watching you through your mirror~pls tell me im not the only one who ever feels this~oh well

When I'm laying in bed and I feel my heartbeat, I turn around so I can't feel it because it makes me feel sick.

the power to regenerate your appendix

I make sims of everyone I know and make them have kids together.

Listening to music walking through town and feeling like you're in a music video

Sometimes hold a piece of chocolate between your fingers until it melts then lick the yummy gooeyness off your fingers

I never even met you! Why do you care who I'm talking to?

Wishing you were living in that time when men were still gentlemen. Holds doors, brings flowers, chooses you over job.

I twerk in the mirror to see how much my ass jiggles

Play call of duty then go around shooting everyone in your mind for the rest of the day

Know almost every line from spongbob episodes.

Before I meet someone I've never met before, I think of stuff to say or do to prevent it from being awkward, but when I finally meet them I do none of the things I thought about doing.

Take pieces of loose hair and keep it in a plastic bag in my wallet so if I ever get killed and my ID stolen, my body can still be identified.

When you look in the mirror, and it ruins your whole day.

I use my magic powers to give shaddy politicians their comeuppance (I don't have any magic powers lol)

I thought I was disgusting until I read the top voted things here. Floral: Actually pretty neat.

I always have trouble leaving a airplanes lavatory I never get the door open

When you are almost crying while laughing in a silent area, you have to think terrible thoughts just to get rid of the laughing.

I have the background on my computer a picture of some cartoon characters,and when I'm alone I talk to the screen like those characters are actually in the room. -Briarwoodninja

When in a room by myself and I hear someone coming to walk into the room I'm in, I feel an overwhelming urge to hide behind the door so they don't see me first.

Thinking, "What is wrong with this generation"

I DO wish I had the ability of the guy in the comment below me. Moral: Yeah I have to type moral down here, because its awesome and because whatever its awesome!

When you start wondering if you're in a dream and suddenly feel trapped

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.