Sneeze for a few minutes when I've eaten too much.

When I see a pregnant woman I can't help but think "she had sex"

Hoping if I fall asleep on the couch while my family is in the room I dont have a dream about sex and wake up moaning and groaning...

When passed by a very attractive girl in the street, turn around and look after her and/or follow her to the next street corner, in order to grasp more of her beauty.

When I get bored of sex and p*rn, I download animal "mating" stuff for variation.

Stopping the microwave at 1 second because it's late and you don't want to be loud.

I have to make a breathing hole for fresh air to come in when I am laying under a hot blanket.

I only EVER take my watch off if I need tto put on big gloves, like cricket gloves.

laugh whenever I see an infomercial where the hosts glorify their products to the point where it seems like they have found Jesus it is hilarious.

Laying alone in bed at night and then every single scary thought, face, image, movie, or whatever starts playing in your mind.

Make a weird face when taking a picture with a friend, never see the picture, so you try to remake the face you did in a mirror to see how stupid you looked...

When someone starts waving and saying hi then I start waving and saying hi even though I have no idea who it is only to realize they are actually waving at someone behind me.

browse the internet at school and look at shit brix and the dog with the jesus butthole appears and the teacher saw and said what are you looking at? i was banned for the rest of the term. jesse footter

When in shower, I turn the heat to max for a few minutes to warm up the whole bathroom.

Have a big twitch, freak out when you are dosing off in class but suddenly wake up.

Try to make a turd that touches the bottom of the toilet before it breaks off.

Getting over excited when you hear a song you like on the radio, even though you have it on your Ipod and can listen to it whenever you want.

Blink and pretend that you just took a picture with your eyes.

Look at my poop before flushing

When i get a back shiver. That's when i know something bad going to happen.

Guessing on those annoying Captcha things and then getting unnecessarily angry when it tells you you're wrong.

When I see a post on this site with a single downvote I start to feel guilty and give the person an upvote because I feel sorry for them.

i can't watch the t.v. unless the volume ends in a 0 or 5

I never find things funny unless I'm in a completely silent room, and it is then that I think or see something funny and begin to almost cry of laughter.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.