When people are walking behind me I automatically think they are staring at my ass and get self-conscious.

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Write b as d and d as b or p as q and q as p. I mostly write b as d and d as b since I've learned the alphabet. Trying not to do that now

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When I'm walking and I step on a crack with my left food, the next time I step on a crack it has to be my right foot and vise versa. I can't step on a crack twice in a row with the same foot. But I don't have to step on every crack.

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Going through a lot of Deja Vu lately, it feels like you have another life before this one.

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judge a spider on it's ability to hide from me and decide to let it survive if I consider it a clever hiding place, then get paranoid because the spider was smart.

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(1) In the middle of a conversation, I start to think of all the crazy stuff I could do even though I would never want to i.e. punching them in the face, making out with them, flashing them.

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Smoking in the shower.

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Realizing that I can just yell out the word "Fuck!" and no one can stop me.

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Eat everything inside my burgers first then i eat the buns.

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While playing a video game, narrate it explicitly in your head, e.i., stringing together absurd amounts of obscenities and scream them telepathically at your foes.

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Sometimes I think my shit smells delicious... and I cant believe I am actually not only typing it here, but "finally" admitting it to myself.

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Try to think of something nice when then thinks I the scariest things

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I use encryption even for everyday, routine communications because f*ck the NSA.

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Stand on the first floor and look up through the 2nd story railing just to look up women's skirts.

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Rubbing the corners of your lips on the side of your hand and smelling it.

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when im in the toilet and invent something in my mind and dont have a pen and paper to wright my invention and when im done i forget about it...

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Drive slow in straightaways and fast through curves, especially sharp ones.

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Pretend like i'm having a conversation with someone talking to somebody on a phone, and randomly say something to go with what the person says.

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When well dressed, someone ask me what I do for a living, I say nothing and watch the confused look come over their face.

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Say "Up and Down" for "Left or Right"

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Wipe a soda can after somebody else in my family drinks out of it just in case I get sick or I may feel there spit.

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Check every spoon fork and knife in the silverware drawer for spots or old food before you choose which one to eat with

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Believing in the kindness of strangers

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try to give your friends spirit animals

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.