Keep things on my body equal. ex. Hold something in my right hand so I hold something equally heavy in my left hand.

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When A situation Doesn't go how I wanted it to go, It annoys me so much I sometimes shit in my hands and clap.

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After eating a sandwich, eat the leftover sesame seeds one-by-one.

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When people are walking behind me I automatically think they are staring at my ass and get self-conscious.

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When I'm home alone at night I check around the corners to make sure there isn't anyone there

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When you're out for a run, you pretend that someone is chasing after you so you run harder.

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eat cake in a bowl with milk the way you would eat a bowl of cereal

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think that you are wasting way too much time on this website and that you could be exercising right now or be doing a million more productive things than righting about doing more productive things on things you think only you do.

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Realizing that I can just yell out the word "Fuck!" and no one can stop me.

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Listening to more obscure music in a public place and turning it up in hopes that someone will ask you what you're listening to and you can tell them about it/open their minds.

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Inspect the shower, bath or toilet, then washing it until you believe it is suitable to use.

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Love feet. like LOVE feet.

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HEY! YOU! Yeah you! I can speak you only, NO! Nobody else here! Yeah you only you, by the way you are a dirty piece of s**t you mothe* F**ker! YEAH ITS YOU! I HATE YOU! EVERYBODY HATES YOU YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU! *end of special message just for you*

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Think about my life as a book when I'm in public, for example "I then walked over to my friend to say hello to him."

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When I get bored of sex and p*rn, I download animal "mating" stuff for variation.

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Wipe a soda can after somebody else in my family drinks out of it just in case I get sick or I may feel there spit.

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Sometimes I wonder how food tastes when not drowned in ketchup.

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Whenever you shave, you make sure you cut both ends of your moustache, leaving a small patch in the middle above your lips. Then you pretend to be Hitler ;)

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try to give your friends spirit animals

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When a stripper sucks you so hard that the tip of your penis gets circumcised

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I hate it when people assume I'm smart just because I don't speak much and I wear glasses.

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speak proper english

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I sniff my finger after I scatch my bunghole lol

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i try to spit onto my line of piss while going to the toilet.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.