Take pieces of loose hair and keep it in a plastic bag in my wallet so if I ever get killed and my ID stolen, my body can still be identified.

Deside to watch a video in bed on your phone or iPad and drop it on your face...

I have to sleep with my bottom lip stuck to the pillow or my hand so I can breathe.

i answer "why" to questions and then when someone gets pissed i say "when" Hey Jim, how's Mary? Why? Because she's your sister and I care about you. Why? Because you're my best friend. Why? STOP IT! When?

Nodding while talking on the phone then remembering the person can't see you

only drink milk from a freshly opened carton

forget i left the light on somewhere in the house and when i see it on i think a ghost did it..

Pretending to use the force while a door closes behind you, then thinking your brilliant :) -Tim.

putting your hand in the water in the back of the toilet and thinking its gross toilet water and get grossed out

Use the massaging shower head on my anus to power blast the poop plaque away

get under the covers and curl up into a ball to get warm really fast

Say something in my head, but then wonder if i said it out loud and just didn't realize.

When posting these, I'm rarely able to read the words/letters in the box that prove you're human and not some computer virus. Now I'm starting to think I'm not a human......

Seeing an acquaintance who you would feel awkward talking to in a public place, knowing they see you as well, and pretending not to see them, while hoping they pretend not to see you as well.

Save more than once on your favourite game.

Refreshing captcha codes for five minutes straight until you find reasonably legible letters.

I rate certain songs on my iPod higher than others because if someone else is checking out my playlists, I don't want them knowing how much I really love that super cheesy song from the early 90's (even though every time it comes on, I hit repeat at least 3 times and sing aloud as loudly as I think I can get away with. I really, really love that song!).

I don't care about who a celebrity dates or marries. Why should I?

I never side with the majority (if given a choice.)

try to only take one step on each sidewalk square.

Walking around on the streets wondering if you are really walking in place, and the earth is spinning according to how you walk, like a treadmill.

Eat the last bowl of ice cream. Then 6 hours later, you wish you hadn't. (sometimes even open the fridge and check whether you actually ate it or not)

I often think about how I am a thing inside of a body

When you are taking a test or anywhere , you remember something funny and you laugh randomly looking like a dumbass then pretend to cough.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.