When dunking oreos I like to hold it under the milk and watch the bubbles til they stop

as you walk down the street, you pretend that all of the people were zombies and you pretend you have a gun and give them headshots (even imitate the gunshot with your mouth) -MATT

Sometimes I wonder if my life is a dream and oneday I'll wake up as a newborn baby

When your watching a YouTube video and you have to watch an AD, you mute it and turn your head away because your just that pissed off at the company.

Write something down here so that it seems like you think its normal when your actually really paranoid that its not.

Get somewhat worried about myself if I'm thumbed down on THIS SITE.

Make sudden movements in the mirror to try and catch out my reflection.

Start the shower so no one hears you shit bricks

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Constantly refresh your email page even though you know nothing will appear.

Sometimes I imagine that I am in a coma and all of the things of this world are not real. Then when I wake up from the coma I will be the best inventor of all time.

When I am in a bind and I know I need help I just say " I gott this" and things work out

Do a little half laugh, then when someone looks at you, you realise that it wasn't even funny so you pretend to be clearing your throat.

Sitting on a toilet in a public bathroom and staying silent until everyone leaves, so you do not feel the embarrassment

Thinking epic thoughts like "Man, had a great workout today" just in case someone is reading my mind.

Have to have a certain light in the bathroom to poop. Also, nobody can be anywhere near me.

Having the TV turned on when using my laptop or else the silence will make me feel like someone is in my house trying to kill me.

When at Burger King, McDonalds etc. I always finish the drink before the food so that I still have the taste of the food in my mouth when I'm finished.

Getting over excited when you hear a song you like on the radio, even though you have it on your Ipod and can listen to it whenever you want.

When sitting or laying down, tell yourself to get up in your head but see how long your body can resist your commands, and end up yelling at yourself to move in your head while still sitting/laying down.

strawberry flavored hemorrhoid cream

When you have a stuffy nose, and you put tissue in one nostril so you can breathe.

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Waiting alone inside a public toilet for someone to come in and open the door.... so you don't have to touch the handle!

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.