Sorry I posted last comment 3 times. And it is best ever not beat ever.

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Going to the bathroom in public just to scratch my butt

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Whenever I think of something creative or weird, I always wonder if someone thought of the same thing.

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Cover the built in webcam on my laptop when I'm using it with a folded piece of paper just in case

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When theres a sex scene in the movie I like to jack off to see if I would last as long as the man -deadpool (yogurt)

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I use my magic powers to give shaddy politicians their comeuppance (I don't have any magic powers lol)

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When you look in the mirror, and it ruins your whole day.

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After going to the toilet to do a S#!* I will only sit on one cheek for the rest of the day until I bathe

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Constantly hearing your name in public and asking "did you just hear my name?"

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Say to yourself "I really should get that work done" then do nothing about it

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it is not disgusting to bite your toe nails, it is a skill

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Do somthing only you do

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Try to make a turd that touches the bottom of the toilet before it breaks off.

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(I have made this mistake mostly when I'm at the movies) When the cashier gives me the ticket and says enjoy the movie because I am so used to people saying have a nice day I say you too!(FACE PALM)

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Waiting alone inside a public toilet for someone to come in and open the door.... so you don't have to touch the handle!

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Right after moving to a new place I check my room for hidden cameras.

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Whenever I drop food on the floor I get my dog to come clean it for me

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wipe your armpit and then sniff it to see how bad you smell

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I pretend to get future messages. Like when I'm about to have a bad subject. I get a message from future me telling present me like 'Oh god. Yeah, brace yourself for science today.'

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Spend a ton of time on the way you look and the clothes you choose, then going out in public and imagining you're a celeb.

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Make a day of reading posts from Craiglist's Best-Of.

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when you're fapping and thinking about someone, you either get a text from them moments later, or stop thinking about them because you feel like they are reading your mind.

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We keep a spare key hidden outside somewhere in case we are locked out

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.