I think my friends are dumb! I love them so much!!

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I find that whenever I go somewhere it always seems to take longer than when I come back home

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I always have trouble leaving a airplanes lavatory I never get the door open

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Sometimes I'll think about something that's so weird nobody would ever do it, and then i figure there's a big chance somebody did it at least once in history.

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touching something (like a crack in a wall) and then thinking to yourself that your the only person thats ever touched it..

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like it when you fart because it scratches your butt when its itchy

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You're taking a poo, and you're bored. You use your thighs as drums to pass the time.

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When I'm home alone, I start hearing random noises and think someone is breaking in.

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Hate people who don't dress like you because they're not fashionable. Hate people who do dress like you because they threaten your individuality.

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Tryng to run away from, or at least be faster than my shadow.

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Mayada stupid

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Lay in bed , and think what i could of said while i was talking to my crush or what could of happen.

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Complimenting a girl awkwardly,and then smiling stupidly later and thinking of alternate versions of the conversation that happened!!

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Poking my self under the covers just to not falleth asleepeth (t -_-)zzzzzz

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Seeing an acquaintance who you would feel awkward talking to in a public place, knowing they see you as well, and pretending not to see them, while hoping they pretend not to see you as well.

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wipe your armpit and then sniff it to see how bad you smell

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Right after moving to a new place I check my room for hidden cameras.

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bounce when your tip toeing.

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1. When you're downstairs at night you go upstairs as fast as fucking possible. 2. When you switch volume in TV, the second number has to be 0 or 5.

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Scratching with the wife's/girlfriends hair brush.

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Whe someone buys you a gift and you think they have installed a camera into it or can somehow mentally see you when that gift is near you. Resulting in you acting strange around that it or when you are present in the same room as that gift

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Before going to the bathroom, check behind the shower curtains for serial killers.

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while I am sitting on the toilet I play with it and waste the toilet paper and of course i just keep flushing it

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Hang something small in front of the webcam, in case someone is secretly watching me.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.