- Things You Think Only You Do

Look at my poo before I flush it.

Pee while setting down even if your a dude.

When home alone and you hear a noise getting out a gun/weapon.

When you're out for a run, you pretend that someone is chasing after you so you run harder.

It's hot but I still have on covers

Look in the fridge 10 times without eating anything

turn off the tv by accident and then turn it on only to find that it takes forever to work again

When I'm riding passenger in a car, things I'm driving past will be a part of my imaginary drum kit. When a car passes in the opposite direction, I'll tap my right foot as the bass drum, a drain hole along the gutter is my left hand snare, and the street signs and lights are the hi-hats in my right hand.

When sitting on the pot I whip and then I feel like I have to crap again.

Only use the left earphone.

Sometimes I would just be thinking to myself and then think of something funny and laugh but I don't share it with anyone else makes me look insane.

watch reality t.v. when you're feeling guilty and think to yourself "at least I'm not as bad as that"

while you put your t-shirt on, you get frightened that someone's watching you behind your shirt so you try to put it on as soon as possible.

When im alone i rub myself in vasaline and pretend that im a slug on the kitchen floor.

When I'm walking I look up at nothing in particular and it causes everyone else to look up too!

Sometimes I wonder how food tastes when not drowned in ketchup.

Drive slow in straightaways and fast through curves, especially sharp ones.

Discovering your friend is an indian (Nicole)

I find that whenever I go somewhere it always seems to take longer than when I come back home

Fire imaginary rocket launchers at passenger planes flying overhead, then panic thinking what if it really blows up?

i try to spit onto my line of piss while going to the toilet.

taking a shit while brushing my teeth.

I thought I was disgusting until I read the top voted things here. Floral: Actually pretty neat.

I love myself, my wife, the threesomes, and I STILL spend time with you! Moral: Which must mean YOURE WINNER! AND STUFF! Either that or you are a sad fuck, cant argue...

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.