Sitting on toilet after pooping without wiping for longer than a minute because your in your phone.

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sometimes i feel like the person i look at in the mirror is not my own reflection

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Sometimes I'll think about something that's so weird nobody would ever do it, and then i figure there's a big chance somebody did it at least once in history.

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I love touching, squeezing and occasionally biting my dog's (read: any dog's) muzzle. I love the texture and the gummy-ness. I also love how pissed he gets when I do it and sneezes after.

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I think about fat women while poking my skinny girlfriend

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Dutch oven myself when I'm lying in bed trying to sleep

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Being in the car and wondering if your parents can read your mind so you think "If you can here me cough in 3, 2, 1..." Sometimes my dad actually does it and he looks back at me and smiles. .-.

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When you think about your life then think your parents had to have sex to make you. Then start thinking about all the gross old teachers you've had that probably had sex. Then when you get older your parents tell you about all the times they had sex when you were in the house.

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Blink and pretend that you just took a picture with your eyes.

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I sometimes deliberately missed buses and trains even if I could easily board them.

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Have troubles sleeping when it's hot.

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Air guitar to a song of how you think it would be on a Guitar Hero game.

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(I have made this mistake mostly when I'm at the movies) When the cashier gives me the ticket and says enjoy the movie because I am so used to people saying have a nice day I say you too!(FACE PALM)

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I don't thumb down any submissions because then I am just as bad as the people who thumb down mine

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judge a spider on it's ability to hide from me and decide to let it survive if I consider it a clever hiding place, then get paranoid because the spider was smart.

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When I'm walking on pavement or tiles I always make patterns, e.g stepping on every second tile, stepping a certain amount of times on each bit of pavement

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Trying on other people's clothes at the gym/laundromat when they ain't looking!! (^_^)

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Wanting to be the Walmart baby model as a kid ^_^

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Sometimes when I fart while sitting down, I lift one leg up.

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In the shower i let water run down my hands so it looks like i'm shooting water out of my fingers.

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Hum up and down in pitch because it makes LED displays dance around.

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when going through this website only read post that have 2 or more thumbs up

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Whenever I have to carry a heavy box with both hands a long distance, my nose decides it's going to itchy.

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Forget a seemingly simple word. Shout it out at random 3 days later...(don't tell me you don't do this)

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.