I gotta get down of Friday

taking a shit while brushing my teeth.

as you walk down the street, you pretend that all of the people were zombies and you pretend you have a gun and give them headshots (even imitate the gunshot with your mouth) -MATT

Legally changing your name to Peter Jankins just cuz

Do a little half laugh, then when someone looks at you, you realise that it wasn't even funny so you pretend to be clearing your throat.

Getting over excited when you hear a song you like on the radio, even though you have it on your Ipod and can listen to it whenever you want.

Try to make a turd that touches the bottom of the toilet before it breaks off.

Thinking ambient thoughts while fondling myself into a semi hard-on.

1. When you're downstairs at night you go upstairs as fast as fucking possible. 2. When you switch volume in TV, the second number has to be 0 or 5.

Sometimes while texting or messaging, I enact the physical gestures that accompany what I'm saying as if it were an in-person conversation, even though no one can see me.

When I drive I sing really loud and then when a car come up next to me I pretend I wasn't singing

Toss something across the room toward the place it belongs, get excited when it lands upright/ perfectly in place, then immediately regret you weren't recording it.

Keep things on my body equal. ex. Hold something in my right hand so I hold something equally heavy in my left hand.

Think long and hard about something but then realise you don't care

Be a loner at school

Accidently send an empty text or text multiple people and send wrong text to wrong person

when your professor describes their wife or husband you imagine their wife or husband.

When I was younger, I would always try to construct some type of car by using the plastic things from Push-Ups as wheels.

I don't use my car air conditioning because I think it's wasteful and it might "run-out" when I'm REALLY, REALLY hot.

I always go to sleep with every single one of my stuffed animals in my arms at the same time because I think that they get lonely and sad if I pick certain ones. Then again I sometimes wonder if they secretly hate me and think I'm a weird creep for hugging all of them every night. I'm 24.

Get excited when the captcha says something related to whatever you're posting

Just ocassionally stand up and pontlessly walk around the house when using the computer. Anyone?

If i read or see something good (on tv )the next time i daydream i am always some how involved in it

Sometimes I cant sleep without something making noise , like a fan .

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.