when you're texting in class and you realize you are staring at your crotch and smiling.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

I always go to sleep with every single one of my stuffed animals in my arms at the same time because I think that they get lonely and sad if I pick certain ones. Then again I sometimes wonder if they secretly hate me and think I'm a weird creep for hugging all of them every night. I'm 24.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

I used to drive home from my girlfriend's house late at night and stop on a stretch of road to take a leak. I'd walk backwards while peeing, creating a crooked line of pee in the road. I'd add to it night after night, then I'd drive by in the day to see my long pee stain in the road only I knew about. Anyone who passed by could see it, but only I knew what it was. It would last until the next rain and I'd have to start over.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

I sometimes start thinking about very non sexual things in the middle of masturbation, like what I'm going to wear the next day.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

when im alone i pretend to sniper zombies out my bedroom window

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Find myself thinking a completely random meaningless sentence as I'm falling asleep with no idea how I got to that thought.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

After eating a sandwich, eat the leftover sesame seeds one-by-one.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Sometimes I cant sleep without something making noise , like a fan .

thumb_up thumb_down -35

when your doing something or going somewhere you think didn't I already do this, like your back in time.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Every time you use a vending machine you hope you get lucky and 2 things drop down.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

I Think people can read my mind....."if you can read my mind nod your head or don't if you don't want me to know that you can" It doesn't work either way but yeah thats just me lol

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Hold my pen or pencil with two fingers cued against my palm and two fingers sliding up the pen with my thumb in between them.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

I just saw the D in Disney for the first time ever. My brain always saw a backwards G. I knew it was supposed to be a D, I just never bothered to fix it. There has been a G there my whole life.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

Think of someone you love while trying to fall asleep.

thumb_up thumb_down -47

Only use the left earphone.

thumb_up thumb_down -57

Sometimes there is a hair in my butt and then I pull it slowly out. And it feels funny.

thumb_up thumb_down -61

When I see someones comment has alot of dislikes , I add on to it .

thumb_up thumb_down -65

Going to the bathroom in public just to scratch my butt

thumb_up thumb_down -65

I hate when my mom hangs my underwear on the clothesline outside.

thumb_up thumb_down -69

Imagine a little person trapped and about to be crushed in the progress bar.

thumb_up thumb_down -83

When someone wants to kill a bug, I'll get insane and catch the bug, then run out and release the bug while saying "NOW YOU'RE FREE!!!!!"

thumb_up thumb_down -87

putting your hand in the water in the back of the toilet and thinking its gross toilet water and get grossed out

thumb_up thumb_down -117

Still sitting on the toilet 20 minutes after you're done crapping... you're not alone.. -Professor.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

realize that no one is listening to me talk so I say something completely random to try and get there attention

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.