wipe all the water off my body (predrying myself) before i get out of the shower, and dry myself with the towel

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Dutch oven myself when I'm lying in bed trying to sleep

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Whenever I get sweaty I put baby powder around my groin area and under arms. Ramos

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Laugh when something happens to someone, but when the exact same happens to you, you say "Its not funny"

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watch lesbian porn instead of normal because you hate have other men in the picture

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if your listening to music, move the volume up and down to experience the bass a lil better

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Opening the fridge door, then trying to accomplish pouring a drink, before the door seals itself forever leaving the cola to the mercy of the outside world.

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If I'm walking with or behind someone I always match their footsteps

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When I drink out of a disposable coffee cup with a lid, the opening on the lid has be on the exact opposite side from the seam where the cup is glued to form the cylinder.

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I chuckle whenever I hear the phase "Stark raving mad." I don't know why.

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I always feel chinese accents are unintelligent.

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I have tried jumping in an airplane to see if I fall in the same spot

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Saying an awkward word enough times so that it doesn't sound like a real word anymore

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When I find a new song I like, I listen to it over and over and over; >>Until I run that sh*t into the ground.

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Drum on the chair between your legs and wonder if people think that you're playing with yourself.

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I eat something and read book/newspaper/magazine at the same time. Then i take food crumbs off the book and eat them too.

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Turn the door knob while closing the door ...so it doesn't make a loud noise.

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When sitting on the pot I whip and then I feel like I have to crap again.

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start telling someone a story and then realize that i would only be funny if they actually saw it.

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Courtesy flush.

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Pronounce hors d'oeuvres 'whores-dev-ers' thinking I'm so witty.

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When well dressed, someone ask me what I do for a living, I say nothing and watch the confused look come over their face.

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Use the letters on my phone to make words to help me remember important numbers

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I think my friends are dumb! I love them so much!!

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.