Whenever I go to the toilet on an airplane I worry that during the time I'm there the plane will drop out the sky.

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When I get bored of sex and p*rn, I download animal "mating" stuff for variation.

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HEY! YOU! Yeah you! I can speak you only, NO! Nobody else here! Yeah you only you, by the way you are a dirty piece of s**t you mothe* F**ker! YEAH ITS YOU! I HATE YOU! EVERYBODY HATES YOU YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU! *end of special message just for you*

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I'm a guy and I like to wear swimwear as underwear

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When you're walking and think of something funny and start laughing, but you don't want people to think you're weird, so you pull out your phone and pretend you're texting.

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You see someone do something cool and imagine doing it in front of all your friends

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Having the tv on always, just for background noise. Doesn't work with a computer/laptop, must be the tv.

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Pick your dead skin then eat it.

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Take off the ends of the banana (

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You pretend to fight imaginary people while no ones looking:/ But you look like the star wars kid...

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look for old friends on facebook to see what they are up to now

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Cough, whistle or hum while on the toilet for a time, just so anyone outside the door doesn't think I'm mastrubating.

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I have a feeling that life is a Video Game for another Universe. When the player looks at their computer screen, they see what I see. They control everything I do. Like The Sims games. Everyone else is either other players in a multiplayer server, or they are are all fake, computer players.

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Trying to figure out what form of suicide would hurt the least.

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Trying on other people's clothes at the gym/laundromat when they ain't looking!! (^_^)

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You or someone you know has a secret crush/liking but the always shout it to the world. My sister does that.(It's why I ask)

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I see something glittery, someone tells me not to pick it up because I'll glitter all over myself, I pick it up anyway and glitter all over myself.

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Keep things on my body equal. ex. Hold something in my right hand so I hold something equally heavy in my left hand.

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I chuckle whenever I hear the phase "Stark raving mad." I don't know why.

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I want to hire a private investigator to follow a private investigator who was hired to follow the first investigator.

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I always feel chinese accents are unintelligent.

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I hate being called "buddy".

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Covering the movement sensors with toilet paper on public toilets incase it's a secret camera.

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try to rip the top off an Oreo without messing up the cream and then if the cream comes out on both parts not wanting to eat the Oreo because its wrong.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.