realize that no one is listening to me talk so I say something completely random to try and get there attention

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When you have a stuffy nose, and you put tissue in one nostril so you can breathe.

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my solve media says spare is big but it was space is big

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Try to make a turd that touches the bottom of the toilet before it breaks off.

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When I'm walking on pavement or tiles I always make patterns, e.g stepping on every second tile, stepping a certain amount of times on each bit of pavement

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I have to put the radio volume in multiples of three and my daughter has to put it in multiples of five so when we are together it either has to be on 15 or 30.

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Being so socially awkward that when you have a successful interaction with another human being, you play it in your head over and over again.

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Surfing nsfw subreddit at work

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Wake up after a dream. About a day later you think about if it was real or not.

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I wonder if old women enjoy sex?

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Look at a guy and think that he is a good looking guy, than immidiatly try to think of something else because thats gay.

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Almost every time someone tells me something sad I have to fight the urge to grin.

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Mares really turn me on, so I download "bad stuff" Ironically though, I worked at a farm last summer and realized there is nothing more disgusting than reality. Still mares turn me on... If on video.

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play on your game for ten minutes before you realise why you stoppedd the last time

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When I find a new song I like, I listen to it over and over and over; >>Until I run that sh*t into the ground.

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Link gross things with porn i.e: Think of really gross things (or friends or family) when fapping to really hot stuff ( the porn becomes ruined)

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Thinking something embarrassing, then having to talk to someone and suddenly getting worried you are about to blurt out your thoughts

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test how many stares you can scale in one step

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After eating a sandwich, eat the leftover sesame seeds one-by-one.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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I hump my bed at night and pretend it's a hot model

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See how fast and accurate i can use the fast forward on my dvr and applaud myself when i go full speed and stop 2 seconds before the show is back on.

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OMG have you ever realized that one of your eyes is showing everything more reddish and the other one showing everything more bluish just like these old 3d glasses

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Think of someone you love while trying to fall asleep.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.