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When a stripper sucks you so hard that the tip of your penis gets circumcised

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When you're walking and think of something funny and start laughing, but you don't want people to think you're weird, so you pull out your phone and pretend you're texting.

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don't wash my hands after using the toilet because its a waste of time

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When you're walking along at night and you see the moon, then you move around quickly,still looking at it as if you're controlling it.

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Get scared while I'm doing things on the computer like writing these comments, or other weird stuff because I think there might be a hacker watching my screen.

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like it when you fart because it scratches your butt when its itchy

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Sniff or tap to a rhythm to some sort of beat I composed in my head...

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Walk next to someone so you don't look too lonely.

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Random strong urge to squeeze immensely cute pet.

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Blink and pretend that you just took a picture with your eyes.

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when i pass a grave yard, i am compelled to hold my breath

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When an ice cube fall on the floor I kick it under the fridge.

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I stick used soap to a new soap so I don't waste it.

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when u get something right and do a victory dance and the person to u is just like "da hell?"

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Tally mark everytime I take a shit.

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If I'm walking with or behind someone I always match their footsteps

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I have an imaginary therapist. I talk to him in my head and he actually gives me really good answers.

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Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie)

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Drool a lil bit and continue eating...

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I flush the toilet if the water's green and I'm going to have a poo, so it doesn't splash me.

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Bored. Open refrigerator. Nothing to eat. Open it again five minutes later.

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While playing a video game, narrate it explicitly in your head, e.i., stringing together absurd amounts of obscenities and scream them telepathically at your foes.

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I say that girl's name I have a crush on right before I go to sleep because I want her to be the last thing I think about, and then wake up realizing that it was super creepy... Only to do it again the next night

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.