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When looking at a digital clock that counts down to seconds, I wait until the seconds are an even number, then I try to say each number in order twice before it changes.

Use an entirely different vocabulary in your head than everyday life.

Sometimes there is a hair in my butt and then I pull it slowly out. And it feels funny.

eating a sandwich with strategically placed bites such that i get the same ratio of crust to tastier non-crust sandwich center in each bite. sometimes i just take two smaller bites of crust and center part so that i don't have to taste mostly bread crust in a mouthful.

Slowly close the fridge door to see when the light bulb turns off.

I sometimes look at a guy and wonder how big their dick is.

Pretend to be texting to look popular in public

I save my files as "askjaskjaks" because I'm too lazy to give them a proper name.

when i have a head or toothache...i hit it harder thinking it will stop or get better

Pretend i'm a sim.

Get excited when the captcha says something related to whatever you're posting

i can't watch the t.v. unless the volume ends in a 0 or 5

Make sure I put the deodorant top back on the correct way -- you know, so the sticker is to the front.

Only taking half a biscuit because it makes you feel bad and then taking another half of a different biscuit.

I think of who will I save if a killer come to school

Try to stop thinking but then just start thinking I'm thinking

recycle the peanuts in my poop to make organic peanut butter

CORRECTION, THINGS I KNOW ONLY I DO. OWN YOU ALL HAAAAAAAAAAAARD! Moral: DOUBLE FLAWLESS! EXPLOSION SOUND!

Every time I walk up the stairs in my own house, I feel compelled to do it on all fours.

When i think about something hilarious that happened previously and laugh about it days later at the most innappropriate time.

as soon as i put some mint gum in my mouth, i sneeze countless times.

WHEN I SHOW YOU A PICTURE ON MY PHONE..DON’T SWIPE LEFT.DON’T SWIPE RIGHT.JUST LOOK. Via: Collection of Love WhatsApp Status

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.